Page 46 of When The Rain Falls

Why did I go on a date with someone I met for five minutes at the mall? And why did I parade around in this stupid outfit? God, I'm such an idiot. I never think things through. I just jump in blindly with both feet. And I actually thought a date with Jack was going to be a new start.

"For the record, I know you can take care of yourself.” Finn interrupts my personal self-scolding.

"You do?" My voice sounds so sullen that I want to become my seat.

"Yeah,” he says, studying the road beyond the dash. “I just didn’t want you to have to.”

I look out my window at the dark silhouette of trees passing by.Why is he being so nice?I slink into the passenger seat and blink back tears.

"I can turn on the radio?” Finn suggests. But I continue to ignore him. “Honestly, quiet Aimee is freaking me out," he admits. "There’s something else isn’t there? Something bothering you.” Great, he can defend your honor in a bar fight and he’s intuitive, too? Of course, he has a girlfriend. A guy like him totally would.

“It’s nothing,” I protest.

But as I say the words, tears are gathering in my eyes. Because thereissomething wrong. And it’s not just how stupid I am. It’s more. It’s the fact that, tonight, when I needed a ride, I had no one to call. Literally no one I could rely on to come and help me out. I look down at my ridiculous excuse for a dress. My tattoo peeking below the hem. A sense of deep and isolating sadness churns my stomach. A tear pools from my eye and runs down my cheek. It feels warm compared to the chilly beads of water on the window.

“Clearly,” he huffs. “I don’t know who you’re used to fooling. But I’m an asshole. Not an idiot.” That pries an unwelcome smile from my lips. He continues. “You know,I’m fineis the most frequently told lie in the English language.”

God. He just won’t leave me alone. I take a deep breath and wipe my face.

"What'snotwrong?" I finally answer. "I wore this stupid nightie to a biker bar. I’m pretty sure my date did drugs in the bathroom. Everyone in there looked like they literally wanted to eat me. I was completely stranded in some rural part of the city where apparently Uber doesn’t exist. Alicia’s right about me. Everyone is. I’m just reckless, and stupid, and I’ll never learn.”

“Hey. Stop that,” Finn says sternly. His face puckered in a scowl, darting between me and the road. I turn my head away from him because I don’t want another lecture. I’m barely holding it together as it is. “Aimee, look at me.” I can’t help but obey. His voice commands it. “Don’t let anyone make you feel that way. We all make mistakes. And this one was on that asshole. For not seeing your worth. You’re a goddamn breath of fresh air, Aimee. And don’t change that. No matter how many fucking Jacks you meet.”

I’m a breath of fresh air? What does that mean? His words feel like a soft touch, brushing away my tears. I look up at the ceiling, waiting for the water to recede back into my eyes.

“I’ve met a lot of Jacks.” I sigh. “Like, a lot.”

“A lot?” Finn asks.

“Too many. I can’t even count them all. I feel like a girl should be able to count the number of guys she’s slept with.”

“Ok.” Finn shifts uncomfortably in his seat. “I think we’re bordering on too much information now.” I don’t miss how his knuckles are turning white against the steering wheel.

“When I was sitting in that bar, alone, I had no one to call. I don’t have one of those 2:00 a.m. friends. Not anymore.” I don’t know why I’m telling him all this. Probably because, who else can I tell? And in a couple minutes, after he drops me off, I’ll just curl into a ball on my bed and let the loneliness consume me. This feels like my only chance to get things off my chest. Things that are so heavy they threaten to suffocate me. Tears sting my eyes and my vision starts to blur.

Finn’s quiet for a minute, his eyes never straying from the dark and rural road. An occasional, giant fir tree creeps into the orbit of our headlights. But other than that, there’s nothing but darkness.

"What's a 2:00 a.m. friend?" he asks. His quiet voice breaks the silence hanging heavy around us.

“A 2:00 a.m. friend. You know," I explain, "a friend you can call at two in the morning when you need someone to talk to. For any reason whatsoever. One that will drop everything for you."

"What about Alicia?"

"She's busy. She's got so much on her plate and she works all the time And my best friend, well, she's got her boyfriend now. Soon to be fiancé." I see Finn nod in understanding. My hands twist nervously in my lap. "When Greg didn't answer, I scrolled through my contact list at the bar. The only person I had to call was the psychic who gave me her number and said she took calls 24/7. I was actually tempted to call her. Pathetic."

Finn darts his eyes off the road to study me for a moment. His head swivels back in front of him.

"Give me your phone," he says. He opens his palm between us, his other hand on the wheel.

"Why?" I ask suspiciously, wiping a tear from my face.

He sighs. He shifts his hand to massage the back of his scalp. I'm clearly annoying him. "Do you always have to be difficult?" he asks. "Aimee, give me your phone." He holds out his open palm to me again. I gingerly place my phone in it. For a second, I’m concerned he’s going to chuck it out the window.

One hand on the steering wheel, he uses the other to hold my phone up to his chest. His thumb moves quickly across the keypad. His eyes flicking between the road and the phone.

"What are you doing?" I find it odd that he, of all people, would be so careless about driving distracted. Especially at night.

"There." He hands it back to me. The phone is open to my contact list. I look down at the screen and laugh. As I laugh, another tear springs free and rolls down my cheek.

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