Looking up at him through my lashes, I smile sheepishly at him.
“Could you bring me a pack of Cigarettes? It’ll help with the nerves for when I ask you to join me here.” I rub my hand behind me on the bed sheets.
A lump gathers in my throat, but I swallow it down, and hold my composure. Hank Harlow assess me, watching me, reading my face. I know he knows that I don’t smoke. He knows everything. Does he know it’s the only way I’ll be able to taste Ryker? Does he know that it’s the only thing that will keep me from joining Alec and Cole? My lip quivers.
Bending forward he presses his mouth to mine, applying the softest amount of pressure, but our eyes stay wide open. He waits to see if I pull away and everything in me screams at metoo, but I hold steady. My soul weeps for the truth I’ve yet to admit, but then he finally pulls away with a satisfied smirk.
“Ok.” Is all he says.
Standing he moves towards the door before stopping and looking at me over his shoulder.
“Clean this mess up before I get back.” He orders.
Once he’s gone I scramble up from the floor and run towards the bathroom. Throwing myself at the toilet, barely making it in time to dry heave all the empty stomach acid I have left. Tossing my head back I wail into the vacant void around me. Flushing, I stand and step over to the sink. Turning on the hot water until it's scorching, I scoop it up and fill my mouth. Everything is on fire. My skin, my lips, my mouth, it all feels like it’s drenched in flames. Yet, the real fire is in my chest, tearing a hole in my heart. A hole that used to house a family I’m not sure I’ll ever get back. Will I ever deserve them again? As the question crosses my mind, I break a little more inside.
Flipping the water to cool, I splash some on my face over and over again. Scrubbing until my flesh is raw and blistered. Looking up at the woman in the mirror. No, a girl. She’s a scared little girl who is struggling to find the signature Kingston fire inside her. Hank is slowly digging himself deeper and deeper in her skin. Dark circles lay underneath her eyes, broken, bloody and bruised.
My hands white knuckle the counter top as my head hangs down and my eyes pinch shut. After taking a deep breath to collect myself, I shut the water off and move away from the reflection that haunts me. Licking my lips, my body winces from the pain that shoots through me. Catching remnants of blood that remain along the cut, the taste of copper sprouts along my taste buds. Everything aches, my mind, body and soul.
Walking back into the bedroom I stare down at the mess on the floor, but choose to leave it for another time. He never comesmore than once a day. Instead, I make my way towards the bed. My ass plops on to the mattress before I gently lift the plate and spoon. With each bite comes a steady throb from filling my starved stomach, but the hunger is worse in more than one way. The smell of the room makes it unbearable to eat in until it blends in with the pain. Soon I feel nothing at all. Soon, my legs are pressed into my chest. Soon, my fingers are tracing the tattoo. Soon, my eyes are drifting closed. Soon, I’m lost to the darkness.
“What the fuck is this?”
I wake with a jolt when rough hands drag down the band of my shorts to reveal Rykers name on my skin. My eyes open to a red faced Hank who’s heaving with fury. My hand jerks to cover my exposed flesh, but before I can he’s pressing the remote sending my eyes to the back of my head.
“I see he has his claws deeper than I thought. Don’t worry, Princessa. I’ll fix this for us.” He growls.
My thighs spasm around the shock. My chest falls with my next breath only to heave when I see the sinister look he gives me.
“Move and I’ll slice your throat wide open.” He orders.
He’s gone in seconds, only the wind from his movements left to skate over me, the door slamming behind him.
Shit. Shit. Shit. Fuck!
I fell asleep. How long was I out? Sitting up, I turn to the mess on the floor and find it clean and gone. Shit. I’m losing time. The sound of footsteps storming towards the room has my heart stopping in my chest. When the door finally opens again my eyes almost roll to the back of my head. Panic sets in and I scramble to the far side of the bed.
“No! No. No. I’m sorry. I- I”
“He did this to you. To us. I’ll fix it, don't worry. I’ll make you whole again.” His words are gargled behind his anger.
I’m climbing the walls, blocked in, stuck in a corner with nowhere to go. Hank stands at the edge of the bed with a remote in one hand and a hot iron in the other. Steam billows from the latter while his thumb hoovers over the other.
“Crawl to me.” He demands.
My skin itches with the order. Something once said to me by Ryker now tainted with the voice of the devil. A demon. A succubus consuming my life. My head shakes back and forth but not in refusal. No, I'm too far gone in utter fear to deny this man anything. My body is reacting in any way it can to hold off the pain to come. One he’s caused once before by the flames that licked up my leg.
“Crawl. To. Me.” He grunts through clenched teeth.
I make my way to him. Crawling on my hands and feet like a fucking dog. It takes a millisecond for me to pause before he’s pressing the button and grabbing my ankles at the same time. In the throws of my shakes, my legs end up wrapped around his waist. Thrashing. I'm thrashing and screaming, but no one can hear me. My wails bounce off the walls around us, my eyes meet those around the room watching us. The stares of the past watching him break me. Dropping the remote, he snatches my throat and slams me into the mattress twice to gain my attention. My vision blurs, from pain or panic I don’t know, but then I feel the cool air on my bare skin. He’s pulled down my shorts and my eyes blow wide.
“I’ll fix this,” he mutters. “I’ll fix this. I’ll cleanse you. I’ll fix this.” He repeats these words over and over again.
Lifting the branding iron, he focuses in on the letters that spell out the one man who will always have my heart. And he slowly. So fucking slowly. Brings it closer. Are we moving in slow motion? I’m watching it happen, but my entire body is cold. It's like I’m floating above us seeing it from another’s point of view. Then, it happens. A sea of flames engulf my flesh.
“Stop!” I screech.
I’m screaming.