Page 166 of Deceitful Vows

“I won’t be mad if you want to be my girlfriend, but I might have to check with Daddy first. He likes you more than he likes Anoushka.” Before I can correct him, he continues. “He’s just confused because everyone keeps saying bad things about you.” He folds his arms over his chest and sinks back. “I guess you were right. Not all mommies are biased. Yours isn’t very nice. She says bad things about you all the time, and she makes my mommy cry.”

I spread my hand over my chest. “My mom made your mom cry?”

Little tears nearly topple from his eyes when he nods. “She told her that she’s not a real mom. That she’s an incuemabator.”

I don’t need to correct him on his last word. The devastation in his eyes tells the story he’s desperate to share without the need for translation.

My first thought is to seek immediate answers to my mother’s involvement in his conception, but there’s something far more important demanding my focus right now.

“How many times has your mom told you she loves you, Zak?”

His face lights up. “At least a trillion times.”

“A trillion?” My mouth gapes and I adopt a shocked face. “I thought maybe a million, but a trillion? No way! That’s crazy.”

The pain in his eyes shifts to adoration. “That’s how much she loves me. She tells me all the time.”

“She must be the best mommy.”

“She is,” he agrees. “She is the best mommy in the entire world.”

“Because she isyourmommy, Zak. That’s what makes her the best mommy.”

His smile makes my heart feel whole for the first time in years, and it will free me to exit his room minus the guilt that saw me entering it. I just need a little more time to relish his gooey goodness before instigating a battle hotter than hell.

“He is the sweetest.”

Anoushka smiles fondly at Zakhar while tracing my steps to the door. I was only meant to visit for thirty minutes. I spent the entire day with him. “He is. And he has certainly taken an instant liking to you. You have a fan for life.”

My chest sinks. “I doubt he’ll feel the same when he learns how badly I stuffed things up for him yesterday.”

Anoushka hands Zak’s care over to a pediatrician before guiding me into the hallway. “There is still time to fix that, Zoya.”

“How?” I ask, lost. “I married a man I’m meant to hate but don’t because I thought it was the right thing to do. It caused more issues.” I breathe out slowly. When it does little to weaken my confusion, I offload it onto Anoushka. “I’m sailing blind. I need help. Help Andrik doesn’t seem willing to give. Look at how he avoided Zak’s room today. He hates me so much he doesn’t even want to share the same air as me.”

“That’s not true. He’s just confused.” Her eyes flick up to a camera dangling above us before she moves our conversation down the hallway. “If you want to help him, you need to appease the people controlling both his emotions and actions.”

I fan my arms out.Did she miss the part when I said I married a man I’m meant to hate?“I’ve done everything I can. I have no other way to assuage them.”

I balk, startled when she whispers, “You could get pregnant for real.”

“Whatever do you mean? Iampregnant.”And suddenly the worst liar in the world.

Anoushka rolls her eyes, lowering the age bracket I placed her in from sixties to fifties. “Mr. Dokovic is a shrewd, ruthless man, but he is old school. He would have completely skipped over your friend’s confession that she gave you fertility treatment. The federation is far more observant. They would have canceled Zakhar’s operation purely on speculation that you lied. If you prove to them that you meant no malice with anactualpregnancy, they will reschedule his transplant.”

Hope dissipates before I can latch on to it. “I wish I could do that, but I can’t. For one, Andrik looks at me as if I am mud under his boot.” When she attempts to interrupt me, I talk faster, too hurt to remain quiet. “And two, I can’t physically get pregnant. I’m… I’m infertile.”

She looks genuinely devastated for me, though it only halts her campaign for half a second. “There are ways you can still get pregnant. Mikhail’s mother did IVF many years ago. With modern advancements, I’m sure you have options.”

“I do, but they take time. That isn’t in our favor. Even now, IVF can stretch from two to twelve weeks. You have consultation appointments, the commencement of treatment, ovulation stimulation, trigger injections, and then the egg retrieval. It isn’t as easy as it sounds.”

My senses smack back into me ten seconds too late.

I blubber when I’m snowed under, and that was a doozy.

Hating Anoushka’s shocked expression, I attempt to smooth it over. “I was extremely hungry, young, and desperate.” Nothing but shame resonates in my tone. “I also figured if I had no use for my eggs, why not give them to someone who needed them?” My exhale ruffles Anoushka’s hair. “I never saw them as my children. I just saw them as my failures.”

Anoushka gathers my hand in hers and squeezes it. “Was the option of egg retrieval never given to you when you were diagnosed as infertile?”

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