Page 26 of Sugar Baby Mine

Punish me for something I did in real life.

Break me and then put me back together again.

Tell me what to do with your words/by force.

I want to not have to be in control for a while.

I want to feel physically overwhelmed by you.

Keep me guessing and off balance.

I could list plenty more, like a lot more, but this selection paints a pretty good picture for now. I put the pen down and pop another carrot in my mouth while I take a picture of what I wrote and send it to Ben. Then I pull up my email and scroll till I find the one from the walk-in clinic for my STD test results, also sending a screenshot. Finally I go perusing the standard checklist of limits so he can go over that, too.

There, that only took me all of twenty minutes. My fingers reach nothing but the watery remains of the carrot bag, so I head to the pantry to pull the doors open. My snack shelf is so barren, I can see the dust on the rack. I grab a box of crackers and a can of cola, because I’ve had my freaking vegetable for the day, settling in the corner of the couch in the living room.

I’m mid-way through an episode ofGolden Girlswhen I get a text from Ben. It’s just a screenshot of his own STD results, mirroring that we are both clean. Nothing to say about the sentences I sent over. Hopefully it was even legible—my lazy scrawl is halfway between print and cursive. Sometimes I can’teven read it myself.

Just when the episode of the show finishes and another starts up, the sound of keys turning the lock in the front door catches my ear, making me turn to look over the back of the couch.

Cora glides through the entryway and tosses her purse on the kitchen counter where it slides another foot as she hangs her coat up.

“Hey, late night?” I ask, closing up the box of crackers and setting it on the coffee table.

“Oh, hi.” She glances over to me as she kicks off her sky high heels. “I was going to stay at Freddy’s today, but I wanted to catch up with you since you never texted me back.” She comes around the corner of the couch to curl into the side opposite me, pulling her feet up underneath her as she grabs the blanket off the back to spread over her bare legs.

“I was a little busy.” Not untrue.

“The whole night?”

“Well…no.” I don’t imagine it when her shoulders deflate. “I went straight to bed when I got home. Sorry for not letting you know I was okay.”

She’s silent for a moment, cool calculation in those amber eyes as they sweep over me. “Did you have a good time?”

There is more than one question there—I know it because I know Cora. It’s why she didn’t just ask how things went. She’s also a greedy little tea goblin who loves a play-by-play, but I’m not going to indulge her that readily.

“I did. A really good time despite how I sorta freaked out at the beginning.”

“Freaked out?”

“I got lost in my head a little bit, then the word vomit came spewing out.”

She scrunches her nose up. “That visual is so unappealing. But you were able to get past it?”

“Yeah, Ben’s actually kind of good at pulling me back. Like you but different.”

Cora brightens considerably, leaning forward to grab my hand on the couch cushion. “That’s great. So things went well between you? You’re going to see him again?”

“I’m seeing him tomorrow.”

She squeezes my hand so tight it’s a wonder she doesn’t drag me across the cushions and into her chest for a hug. I know she wants to.

“You have no idea how happy that makes me. I’m glad it’s working out so far. Ben’s a really nice guy, and you deserve this.”

Oh, he’sniceall right.

“What do you mean by that?” Cora tilts her head with intrigue.

Shit. I said that out loud.

---