Page 31 of Guarded Rebellion

“You’re saying it’s more than wanting to be a pain in the ass so he’d notice you?” she asked.

“Yes. I just want to… live.” I blinked quickly to stop the tears from burning my lids any further.

“Then I suppose I shouldn’t play devil’s advocate and mention that frat party coming up tonight…” She glanced aside in a terrible feign of innocence. “Because if I were trapped in a hopeless future I didn’t want, going to a party would sure as hell be a once-in-a-lifetime experience I wouldn’t plan to miss.”

I smiled. For the first time today, I let my face morph into something other than a frown or scowl. “A party?”

Kelly nodded. “I’ll go if you go.”

The logistics of pulling this off would need to be addressed. I’d need her help to sneak out. I could hope for Lev to be distracted with calls again. Something would have to give because she was right. If I wanted to truly live and embrace this freedom the rest of the world could take advantage of, to go and do as they pleased, then I had to go to this party. Not to get drunk or high. Not to score with a man and lose my virginity. I wasn’t stupid and I wouldn’t suddenly become a bad girl gone wild. I just wanted to… see. To walk on the other side and experience it all.

“We’ll figure out how to make it happen,” I told her before we disconnected the call.

I lay back on the bed, sighing and letting my hopes rise. I would make this work. I’d go to that party, if for no other reason than to prove to myself and Lev that I could.

He’d be so mad…

If he were to learn of my plans to defy him and party, he’d be so furious that he’d ante up his discipline.

Which… wouldn’t be that bad.

I toyed with my lip, raking my teeth over it as I considered how my strict bodyguard might react to my stubbornly disobeying him and going to this frat party. I hated to admit it, but seeing him get all high and mighty and mad made him hotter. Hearing the command in his gruff voice turned me on. Something had to be very wrong with me to feel my heart racing in excitement at his grabbing my hand, holding me in place, and ordering me to be disciplined.

“Of course, I’m fucked up in the head,” I mumbled, rubbing my hands over my face.

My father never acted like a parent and never disciplined me. My mother had been absent my entire life and I’d missed out on her guidance. Only Uncle Oleg served as a form of adult mentorship, but that didn’t mean anything ordinary. The man was a fearsome Mafia Boss, and I learned early on that if I minded my own business and stayed out of his way, I would never need to be disciplined.

But with this intoxicating thrill of defying Lev and the nearness of experiencing something that would never be feasible in the fated future I would have to suffer, I couldn’t wait to act out and step out of line.

I was allured by the chance that I could push my sexy guard intomorediscipline. More guidance and commands.

Maybe, just maybe, I could push him so far that he’d snap and give me what I was slowly realizing I wanted so badly.

Another illicit kind of experience—intimacy with him.

13

LEV

Eva stayed in our apartment for the most of the twenty-four hours of her discipline. Those hours were long, and I wasn’t deluded to assume she’d be happy when the time was over. I counted on her being even more rebellious. If putting her in time out wouldn’t teach her a lesson about acting out and deliberately trying to push the boundaries I—and her uncle—had set out for her, then I’d think of something else.

My fantasy about spanking her was an impossibility I couldn’t waste my time on, but the longer I thought about her sulking in her bedroom, I grew uneasy. Just that one wall separated us, and with her so angry at me and my frustration with her anteing up higher, I knew I needed some distance.

She wasn’t supposed to tempt me. I had no business lusting after her, stimulated and attracted to how gorgeous she was when she cracked. Losing that icy, frigid bitch persona let me seeher, a young woman eager to get her way for once.

Not happening.

My job was to keep her safe and pure. And that was what I’d fucking do.

That didn’t mean I had to stay here and be “grounded” with her. A quick call to Marcus secured the apartment once more.

“She’s not to leave.” I furrowed my brow as I looked down at him. “At all.”

“Yes, sir,” he dutifully replied. “When will you be back to take over?”

I looked at the time, wondering how long it would take for me to investigate the matter of what Rurik had texted me. My motivations to leave the apartment were split two-fold. I needed a break from being near Eva when she tempted me so. But I also had to pay due diligence in following up with what Rurik had reported. More Petrov soldiers had arrived on campus, near another dormitory, and I was suspicious about that development.

“A few hours. I will contact you when necessary. Until my return, however, she is not to set foot out of this apartment. Nor should anyone enter.”

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