Page 20 of Guarded Rebellion

Eva:I didn’t look like that.

Kelly:You’re right. You didn’t. You looked like this.

Another GIF came. This one was of a woman hurrying to take her clothes off and being too clumsy to manage.

“Oh, shut up,” I mumbled out loud. A smile won the fight, though, and I felt stupidly giddy thinking of how to reply to her.

“Well, I know that smile isn’t because you’re texting your boyfriend,” my lab partner said wryly.

I lowered my phone as I locked the screen, turning to face Irina Petrov. She flicked her long, straight, chestnut hair back as she gave me a cool once-over.

“Because I know you can’t have one,” she finished.

I didn’t reply, losing the mirth-like feeling that had me wanting to grin and giggle with something that seemed a lot like girl talk with Kelly.

I hadn’t encountered Irina directly on campus. I’d noticed her, as had Lev and Rurik. Petrovs were our rivals, and while the violence and fighting never reached me personally, I’d been raised with the understanding that there would never be a Petrov and Baranov alliance. Much less a friendship.

While Irina wasn’t suggesting we become buddies, I wasn’t sure how to interpret her comment. For one, she was right. I didn’t have a boyfriend, and I never would. I would only transition from a virginal nobody to a bride via an arranged marriage. Dating and getting to know men wouldn’t happen for me. And it wouldn’t for her either.

It almost could bridge us together, kindred in the sense that our fates were identical, just in different Mafia Families, but I was too guarded to warm up to her.

“What are you doing here?” I asked instead, not being outright rude but inquisitive. “I haven’t seen you in my lab before.”

“They had to mix up the labs this week. My TA is out.” She shrugged, already losing interest as she lowered her attention to her lab book, doodling on the margins of the page.

“Hmm.” I lowered my phone facedown, nowhere near prepared to look at the screen while she could see. Our not being allowed to have boyfriends was an odd thing to share in common, but it wasn’t enough to make me want to befriend her. No trust had been established by her commenting that we were equally stuck in our lives.

For anyone else watching, we were cool to each other, not inviting any more conversation. Irina didn’t push to ask what was making me smile or who I could be texting on my phone. It wasn’t her business, but I could give credit where it was due. Shewasn’t nosy, but then again, she knew better than to put her nose where it didn’t belong. Our families had lines between us for a reason.

Even if she was trying to strike up a conversation and befriend me, I wouldn’t know how to manage it. I didn’t make friends easily—other than Kelly. She and I had hit it off effortlessly, and it was another reason I loathed that Lev had prevented me from rooming with her in the dorms.

I felt close to Kelly, almost as though she were the sister I’d always wished to have. Sonya wasn’t a sibling anymore. Wherever she was, if she was alive, was too far of a separation for me to reconcile with.

I sighed as the teaching assistant, or TA, came into the room. Lab began, but from reading the material ahead of time, I was prepared for this one to be a boring one. A slow lab. As such, my mind wandered and I thought back again and again to what Kelly had texted me. No phones were allowed during labs, but with today being a computer modulated exercise, not something with actual chemicals and materials, several students broke that rule and got their phones out. I did too, seeing that Lev and Kelly had texted again.

Lev:Irina Petrov entered your lab.

I rolled my eyes.Duh. And so what?I was here to study, not pay attention to what my peer from a rival family did. She happened to be my assigned lab partner, but we’d done our exercises on our own laptops, not even collaborating.

Kelly’s text was far more interesting.

Kelly:Ok, ok. I’ll stop teasing. Don’t be mad and shoot the messenger delivering the news that you’ve got it bad for Lev.

Eva:I’m not mad.

I’d never typed a reply so fast. I didn’t want her to think I was mad at her. Here I was embracing our friendship, and she was worried about being ghosted.

Eva:Sorry I couldn’t text back. Chem lab.

Kelly’s opinions mattered. She was a friend, and she was observing how Lev and I didn’t get along. Letting her see me clearly turned on was a flaw I couldn’t control, but I wondered how helpful she might be in offering advice on how to handle this dilemma.

Rebelling against Lev had become a habit. The thrill at getting a rise out of the grumpy jerk was too irresistible to stop. I bit my lip, stalling in leaving the lab even though my work was done.

I couldn’t face Lev yet.

Not when I was coming to the full realization of how much I enjoyed rebelling and fighting with him. Guards had never inspired me to bicker or talk back before. But something about getting that heated glare from Lev just… made me wild for more. It was wrong. Iknewit was forbidden to lust for a man who worked for the family, especially since my uncle had yet to determine who my groom would be.

Irina sighed, moving her finger over her mousepad as she sat up straighter to unkink her back and neck. Her movement caught my eye, though, and I couldn’t help but wonder if she had ever faced this problem. If she’d ever desired one of the Petrov soldiers. She had them with her here on campus somewhere, but I didn’t get the impression they were in her face and tailing her shadow everywhere like Lev had been with me.

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