Page 33 of Calamity Rayne Knocked Up

“It’s a little cold in here.” When he reached under my paper blanket, I slammed a hand between my legs. “Hale!”

“What? You’re my wife. It’s not like I haven’t seen it a million times before.”

“First of all, it’s not anit, it’s aher.Second of all, don’t be inappropriate.”

He sat back, crossing his arms over his chest, and stared at the stirrups. “We could have one of those delivered to the house.”

Before I could yell at him for being a pervert, the door opened, and a cheery redhead waltzed in. “Hello!”

Well, wasn’t she chipper?

“Sorry to keep you waiting. We’ll have you out of here in no time. And, good, you’re already in position.”

I adjusted the modesty blanket and opened my gown,exposing my belly.

The tech turned on the monitor and faced me with an enormous wand. “Oh, the doctor ordered a transvaginal ultrasound so you can keep your gown closed.”

I blushed and covered my stomach just as she rolled a condom down the long penis-shaped stick. That’s when I understood that enormous dildo was a camera. My eyes widened.

“That’s how you collect the images?” Hale grinned and I rolled my eyes.

“Why don’t you just ask for some popcorn, Hale. It’s not a movie premiere.”

The tech chuckled as she squirted a blob of lubricant on the end of the giant wand and handed it to me. I looked at her questioningly. “Um?”

“You’re going to insert the transducer into the vagina, and I’ll guide it from there.”

If Hale’s grin got any bigger I was going to smack him in the head with the big dildo. “I just, uh, put it inside?”

“Yup.”

Face burning, I bent forward and slipped the rod inside. It didn’t matter that there was lube and a condom, this was the most unsexual situation I’d ever been in.

A black-and-white image moved on the screen. “Great. I’ll take it from here.”

She reached between my legs and gripped the end of the probe. Was this what the crop circle aliens did when they abducted people?

“Go ahead and lie back and relax, Rayne. No reason for you to be uncomfortable.”

If only she knew me.

Her gaze was glued to the screen.

Hale wagged his brows, and I shot him fireballs from my eyes.

“Try to relax. You’re tensing.”

Jesus, she could feel that?

“How exactly does this work? Is it sonar?” It was reassuring to see that my husband still had some maturity left. He frowned at the blurry images on the screen.

Was that what my internal organs looked like?

“Yes. The transducer emits high-frequency sound waves that bounce off internal structures and create images of the pelvic organs.” She moved the wand, and my eyes went wide. She was really freaking up there. “There’s your wife’s cervix. And this area here is the rectum.”

“I thought I recognized that.”

I was going to killhim.

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