There’s still more I want to discuss with Matt and Xavier, but now isn’t the time. Not when Sarah so clearly needs to be comforted. Needs to be held. She needs me to tell her over and over that she’s not to blame until she finally believes it.
“I think we should continue this tomorrow,” I announce. “Erik, Niall, and Rhi should be back first thing, so we can have a full team meeting. Discuss plans. Right now, Sarah’s safe, and that’s the most important thing.”
“You don’t have to stop because of me,” Sarah says softly. “I can handle it.”
“Dante’s right.” Matt closes his laptop and rises from his seat. “We’ll get a fresh look at things tomorrow.”
Xavier gives Sarah a kind smile. “I have no doubt you can handle anything.”
Her lips lift slightly. “Thanks, Xavier.”
Then the two make a speedy exit, leaving me and Sarah alone in my apartment again.
For a minute, we sit in silence, both of us caught up in our thoughts.
Emotions are bouncing crazily around in my head. Guilt. Fear. Protectiveness. Worry. And this feeling for Sarah that’s so much deeper than affection.
But it doesn’t matter how I feel. Right now, the important thing is making sure she’s okay—not just physically, but emotionally. So I give her hands a little squeeze and ask, “What can I do? Do you want to eat something? A snack? Would you like something to drink? I might have some tea that my mom sent. Do you want to put something on to watch? Or go to bed? Or?—”
“When we were in the car, I had this thought.” Sarah turns, crossing her legs pretzel style as she faces me. “I was scared, of course.”
“Oh, Sarah.”
“But that’s not what I want to tell you.” She takes a deep breath and blows it out slowly. “I’ve heard people say that experiences like that put everything into focus. And it’s true. That’s why… I’m not going to wait. Because you never know when?—”
My heart wrenches painfully. “No, Sarah. Nothing is going to happen to you.”
Her gaze is steady on mine. “I thought… I didn’t want to die after finally finding the man I think might be the one.”
Oh. It’s a sledgehammer slamming into my chest. A battering ram. A tank.
I can’t breathe for a second.
“I know it’s soon,” she adds quickly, “and I’m not saying I expect a lifetime commitment. There are still so many things we have to learn about each other. You know I was engaged before. But this thing with you, it’s so much bigger than anything I’ve ever felt.”
“Sarah…”
“If I’d known how… all-encompassing it could be, I never would have gotten engaged. I would have kept waiting.” She pauses, and her cheeks go pink. “Maybe I shouldn’t say this. Maybe it’s too soon. But if I’d met you first, I would never have considered anyone else. Ever.”
“Sarah.”
The red in her cheeks spreads down her neck and across her chest. “Isit too soon?” She looks at me worriedly. “Did I mess things up between us?”
“No.” A feeling of lightness expands inside me, chasing away the guilt and fear and worry. I lift Sarah onto my lap, then touch her chin gently, so she’s looking up at me. “You did not mess things up. And it’s not too soon.”
“It’s not?”
“It’s not.” And I start feathering kisses across her cheeks, her forehead, her jaw, and even the lightest one to her poor, hurt lip. “It’s not too soon. And I feel the same way. Like my heart knows you’re the one I’ve been waiting for.”
“Dante.”
“From the first time I met you,” I tell her, “sitting there at the table, looking so pretty in your yellow dress, and you had that flower in your hair, and when you smiled… you captured me. And when I got to know you, I liked you even more. I wished… that Icouldask you out. That you were single.”
“Dante.” She strokes my cheek. “I’ve thought about you a lot since then. At the wedding, I couldn’t let myself think about you that way… but I think, deep down, I knew even then. That once I met you, I couldn’t be happy with anyone else.”
Thisjoy.
Framing her face, I stroke my thumbs along the delicate lines of her jaw. “Is it crazy to feel this way already?”