Page 6 of Grumpy Puck

“The nerve of that guy.”I set Wolfgang onto the little table in my makeshift dressing room.

His beady eyes glint, as though with wisdom.

Meine Liebe, men like that need to unwind in pine forests, take warm baths, and eat copious amounts of cheese.

“Great.Now I have a mental image of Michael, naked, roaming the forest for honey… and then relaxing in a warm stream.”

Wolfgang rubs his front paws on his face, like my dirty thoughts have made him feel unclean.

“Whatever.”I scout the little room for something dry that I can wear.

Dusty magazines.Nope.

Expired Gatorade.Nope.

A pile of hockey jerseys.Score.

Stripping down to nothing, I utilize a few of them as the worst towels ever, then put on the largest one, which happens to be the number eight.

Okay.The jersey is scratchy and way too baggy, but it covers all of my girl parts, so it might just work.

I take a few steps and cringe.Going commando like this will suck.Maybe I’m better off wearing wet undies than none?

Someone knocks on the door so loudly Wolfgang squeaks and leaps off the table onto my arm before scurrying up to my shoulder.

“Who’s there?”I yell.

“Michael,” a familiar voice growls in a very bear-like manner.“Come out.Quickly.”

I approach the door but do not open it.“I’ll come out when I’m good and ready.”And when I have underwear on.

“Do I need to break this fucking door?”

“Didn’t we just decide not to talk to each other?”Despite my combative words, I use a soothing tone that Grampa taught me.He trained lions, but his techniques work on rats as well, so I figure a bear shouldn’t be that different.

“Fucking fuck,” he growls.“Can we start the not-talking after I get you out of this fucking building?”

Curiosity runs in my family, so I can’t help but open the door a crack.“Why are you getting me out of the building?”

“My stupid teammates are playing a prank on you as we speak,” he grits out.“In five minutes, all the doors in this fucking place will lock.”

Shit.“Why didn’t you say so from the start?”

“I thought telling you to come out quickly would be enough.”

The only reason I don’t argue is the lack of time.

I open the door fully.“Lead the way.”

He looks me up and down with a strange expression, then takes off down the corridor with ground-eating strides.Despite my longer-than-average legs, I have to jog to catch up, clutching Wolfgang to make sure he doesn’t fall from my shoulder.I don’t jog fast enough, apparently, because he stops at the first turn and glares at me.“Don’t you understand the concept of hurry?”

“I’m practically sprinting,” I huff.In fact, I ran out of the dressing room in such a rush that I’m barefoot.I also completely forgot to resolve the underwear question, and now I feel a draft on my nether regions, made all the worse by the dampness caused by Michael’s T-shirt clinging to his powerfully muscled back.

On my shoulder, Wolfgang chirps.

Meine Liebe, I usually prefer females, and rats at that, but even I have to agree—this man looks gouda.

“What the fuck is ‘practically’ running?”Michael demands.“Run like you don’t want to be stuck in this building all night.”

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