Page 3 of Grumpy Puck

Correction,mynew apartment.

Yep.One of the main perks of this job is a rent-free place to crash, so I don’t have to live with the literal circus that is my family.

“I can help,” Kangaroo says, trotting after us.“Find some clothes, that is.”

Michael’s growl goes polar.“What did I just say, Jack?This is your last warning.”

Kangaroo Jack?I could swear my grandma was recently watching a movie with that exact title while rehearsing her tightrope-walking routine.

“I’m supposed to meet the team,” I explain without stopping.“The coach told me they’re about to finish practice at the rink.”

He also said that this first week is a probationary period, and that I’ll lose the job if I mess up.Or if Ted shows up with a “miraculously good excuse for his vanishing act.”

“You’ve already met the team,” Michael informs me.“Remember the morons by the pool?”

Oh.Great.I turn and face him.“Present company included?”

He frowns.“I’m on the team, but few people call me a moron and?—”

“You’re a moron,” I say.

Kangaroo Jack’s eyes widen.

“I pushed you, so I’ll ignore that this time,” Michael growls through teeth clenched so tightly their enamel is in big trouble.“Come back tomorrow.If our coach asks, we’ll all say?—”

“Fine.”Wolfgang would appreciate a session under a hair dryer.“It was not a pleasure to meet you.”

Unless we count his touch, that is, and the feast my eyes enjoyed until I learned what kind of a man he is.

Michael’s jaw tightens further.“The lack of pleasure was mutual, I assure you.”

“Those are not real sayings,” Kangaroo Jack complains.

“Go to the dick!”Michael snaps at him.

As far as I know, that’s not a saying either—but I like it and may use it on my youngest sister the next time she tries to show me one of her cringy contortionist pretzel poses.

I keep walking, ignoring the men trailing after me, and soon reach the small closet that was assigned to me as a dressing room.Before I can step inside, I notice that someone helpfully left a tall, skinny mirror right outside the door, sparing me from having to run to the bathroom the next time I suit up.

My reflection makes me wince.I look like a sad, soggy bear who’s just eaten a similarly wet clown… and now his tummy hurts.

Unable to help myself, I get into character.“Roar.Bearman so mad.Bearman wet, like pussy.”

There’s such a loud gasp from Kangaroo Jack that I half expect him to swoon when I whip around to check what’s wrong.

Wow.For some unknown reason, Michael is staring at me with such menace on his face you’d think I drowned his puppy, ate his kitten, and stuck his lucky puck up my butt.

“Do you know what happened to the last person who mocked him like that?”Kangaroo Jack exclaims in horror.Shooting a nervous glance at Michael, he informs me shakily, “He lost four teeth.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Michael growls.

“Oh, right.It wasn’t four,” Kangaroo Jack says, backing away from Michael as if he were radioactive.“It was seven.”

Chapter2

Michael

“What are you talking about?”The mascot girl protectively clutches the rat to her chest—like I’d ever hurt a woman or a small animal.

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