Page 90 of Grumpy Puck

No.I did what I had to do.He’s met them just the once, and he didn’t even stay for the whole dinner.Who knows what would’ve happened if we’d continued with our relationship?

Actually, I do.He would’ve dumped me, like all the others.

It was just a matter of time.

Regardless, my chest is painfully tight as I head over to the theater, where I find Max waiting for me along with everyone else from the interview.There’s also a large group of unfamiliar people who turn out to be theater staff and their families.

“We have a tradition,” Max says.“Everyone gets to see the first rehearsal.”

Wow.Good team-building exercise but nerve-wracking for me.

I set up the projector, get on the stage, and start with something easy: I dress the rats in cute outfits that have been waiting for just such an occasion and have them strut around like models on a runway.

The rats don’t seem to mind the crowd watching us, which is great.The same can’t be said for myself.I actually feel some stage fright even though this group is only about a tenth of the maximum capacity of the theater—not to mention, I’ve performed in a sold-out circus in the past and have been a mascot at a crowded hockey game.

I guess the fact that this is important is messing with my head.

But hey.Everyone cheers when the first act is over, and that gives me the confidence to proceed.I get the feeling that I’ll be able to handle a bigger crowd—it will just take a little getting used to.

When I get back to my hotel, my phone rings.Just like earlier, my heart leaps when I think it might be Michael, only for it to dive in disappointment when I see that it’s Seraphina again.

“Sorry,” she says without preamble.“I should have congratulated you on the job.”

“No.I’m sorry.I know you want what’s best for me.”

“Exactly.”

“And this job is that,” I say, wishing I felt as sure as I’m pretending to be.Refusing to give in to my malaise, I tell her about my first rehearsal, including the unexpected stage fright.

“Yeah, I wouldn’t worry about that,” she says.“You’re a Klaunbut.No matter how packed the circus, we can swallow swords and stick our heads into a lion’s maw.What’s a little rat action compared to that?”

Chapter26

Calliope

Over the next month—not a couple of weeks, as Max had hoped—my rats and I are so busy preparing for our first real show I barely have time to mope.That is, I only cry for an hour or two daily, check my phone for some communication from Michael hourly, and see mental montages of us kissing under the most ridiculous of pretexts, like when I spot two doves sitting close together on a tree branch.Or when I see any kind of birds doing anything at all, even pooping on cars.

By the time my first show is about to open, I feel barely any stage fright, which is great.The rats kill it during the performance, especially with the unicycle sequence.After the show is over, the crowd actually rises to their feet to give us a standing ovation.

As I take my bow, I want to kick myself for not fully enjoying this pinnacle moment in my life.More than anything, I want Michael to be in that crowd.I want him to hug me afterward.I want him to?—

Realizing I’ve stayed bowed past the curtain falling, I unbend, give my little guys amazing treats, and then go mingle with my family, who flew in for the show and sat in the front row.

“So,” Seraphina says when we’re alone together.“How bad was the stage fright?”

“Not bad at all,” I tell her.“Go ahead and say ‘told you so.’”

“Told you so.”She grins maniacally, but then her expression turns serious.“Have you heard from him?”

I don’t need her to explain who the “him” is in this scenario.

“No.And I didn’t expect to.”I hoped.And prayed, but?—

“Have you called him?”she asks.

I frown.“Why would I?”

“Um, because you’re the one who left?”

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