Page 53 of Grumpy Puck

Meine Liebe, a cake made of cheese sounds like mana from the heavens.

“You can’t have this.Sorry.”I press the elevator button, put on my headgear, and grab the cake.“According to research, sugar is more addictive to a rat’s brain than cocaine.”

Wolfgang chirps.

Meine Liebe, now I have a craving for a cake made out of cocaine and cheese.

The elevator opens and the elderly couple inside examines my outfit and rat with barely suppressed smiles.In the hotel lobby, some people even chuckle, but when I get outside, no one seems to bat an eye.Everyone acts like clown bears carrying cheesecake with rats on their shoulders are as normal in New York as sky-high rent.

Once I get to the stadium, the security let me through without so much as a blink.

Interesting.I guess if I were a crazed fan who wanted to get into the game without a ticket, all I’d have to do is get myself a mascot suit.

Spotting a big clock, I put a steadying hand on Wolfgang and start running, pushing aside the hockey fans in my way, all to everyone’s amusement.

“Hey,” Coach says when he spots me.“Your custom skates are finished.”He gestures across the hall.“They’re on the bench in there.”

I walk into the room in question with widening eyes.It’s a locker room for women.Who knew such a beast existed in the world of hockey?

Because I’m in a rush, I set down the cake and quickly slide my feet into the skates.They fit snugly and perfectly, just like Michael’s cock in my pussy.

Even when I come out, my cheeks still burn, so I’m glad for the bear’s head that hides them from Coach’s view.

“Let’s hurry,” he says when I come out with the cake.“You’re on.”

He leads me to the rink, and I’m grateful for all my earlier practice because seeing so many people in the stands is unnerving, to say the least.

“Hold this.”I give Coach the cake.“It’s for later.”More specifically, for when I see Michael.

Gliding out onto the ice, I ignore my hammering heart as I start my shtick with the mascot dance.

Chapter15

Michael

By the time I’m finished gearing up, all my teammates are long done, and Coach is waiting to give a speech.

“Do you mind if I say a few words this time?”I ask him.

He looks taken aback but shakes his head.

“Listen, guys.”I make eye contact with each and every one of them.“I know technically this game doesn’t count toward anything, but I’m here to tell you that it does.It’s actually the most important game of your life because everyone expects you to fail, and fuck that.”

I continue with a speech that was strongly inspired by one that the US hockey team received during the 1980 Olympics, before they defeated the much stronger Soviet hockey team in a victory so unlikely it is known as the “Miracle on Ice.”

Because we need our own miracle here.

When I finish, everyone cheers and not sarcastically, as far as I can tell.

“I don’t think I’m going to give a speech today,” Coach says with a grin.“Michael is a hard act to follow.”

Isaac looks like I’ve pissed into his beer.He probably had a plan to play at captain and say a few words.

Everyone else cheers again, and we head to the rink.

On the way, I try to psych myself up the way I did my teammates, but that’s difficult to do.Everything has gone so wrong up until now.For fuck’s sake, I even broke my cardinal rule: no sex before a game.And what’s worse, a part of me feels that even if we lose, having been inside Calliope might’ve been worth it.

Regardless, we shouldn’t have done that before a game.

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