Page 53 of If Only In Our Dreams

“I guess so,” Miles agreed, eyeing me curiously. “Have you tried again?”

“Tried what?”

“Sleeping on his arm?”

I pushed the gate open so he wouldn’t have to, and stumbled a little. “Why the hell would I do that?”

Already though, visions of leaning against Ben, of snuggling up against that bulk and taking a little cat nap assaulted my senses. He’d smell good. He always did. He’d be warm and solid. Big enough to block the rest of the world out.Safe.

I shook my head to clear it.

“If it worked once, it might work again. Worth a shot,” Miles continued.

“As if I could just go up to him and be like, ‘Hey, so you know how I creepy slept on your bicep? I should do that again.’ Yeah, right.” I rolled my eyes.

“Ben’s a doctor,” Miles countered. “If you explain your situation he might be open to helping.”

“No thank you.”

“He took an oath.”

“How the hell do you know?”

“I dunno,” Miles shrugged. His brow pinched. “Don’t all doctors have to take an oath? Help the sick and needy, or whatever.”

“I’m not sick. And I’m not needy.” I glared at him, though even this—fighting with him—was better than being away from him. We rounded the corner, and Miles’s questions were halted as he paused, shocked all over again.

“What in the hell?” he muttered, staring at the haunted house with wide eyes. “I thought this would be gone by now.”

“Cool, right?” I grinned, distracted from my own ire. “I’m fixing it!” I’d been working on this shit all week. Watched YouTube videos. Borrowed tools from Matilda’s shed. Cleaned up all the spooky decorations meticulously till they looked worn, but clean. And now I was going to paint them—starting with the coffin at the back end.

Yeah.

That was a good place to start.

“It didnotlook like this when I was here on Halloween.” Miles’s eyebrows nearly climbed into his hairline. “This what you been doin’ while I been workin’?”

“Yeah,” my chest puffed up.

“Why?” Miles stared at me for a second like he didn’t know who the fuck he was looking at.

My cheeks went hot all over again.

Truth be told, I didn’t really knowwhy. I mean…I did. Matilda and Beatrice had been talking. I’d found out Ben’s daughters hadn’t gotten to see the haunted house. I’d decided I wanted to give that to them—and Ben.

That I could fix this.

Maybe it was because there was little in my life I could fix now. Couldn’t go back in time and change the past. Couldn’t change anything about my physical health—at least…not the way I wanted. Despite the fact I’d told Miles I wasn’t sick and needy, I totally fucking was.

And I guess…

I guess…when I heard about the haunted house I just thought—finally, this is something I can do.

Something I can fix.

I can make those little girls smile. Make Ben smile.

Pay him back for letting me borrow his arm—and maybe…maybe, when I’m gone, they’ll miss me. I’ll have done something good for fucking once. Made a difference, somehow.

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