Page 24 of The Bratva's Auctioned Bride

Hearing those words from him, said so plainly as if it were the most normal thing for him, only further stoked that irritation in me. Not only did it grate against my nerves, but it was also a cold reminder of what little choice I had in the matter. How everything that happened after the gala was completely against my will—well, aside from giving in to him after the wedding, of course.

Regardless, he set me up to be nothing but his wife. Just a woman stowed away in his house, left to meander aimlessly and wait for him to get home. It wasn’t what I wanted for myself. Never did I ever think I’d wind up in that situation, forced to look back on all the times I had nothing but endless choices and complete autonomy. Even if my brothers ran a similar business, I had never been restricted like this before, and I didn’t know how to handle it.

It left me torn between those two desires again—wanting him but also wanting my life back.

Unable to handle his satisfied expression any longer, I got up from the couch, shaking my head absently as I left the room.

It took everything in me not to blow up at him again, even if I had unloaded my thoughts and feelings on him the last time we fought.

A sense of dread sat heavily in me as I left out the back door, glad the alarms were still deactivated due to him coming home. He made no move to follow, to my relief, and I continued out to the in-ground pool.

My head was a jumbled mess, unsure of what to think or feel. The constant flitting between thoughts made me feel exhausted, and for a moment, I just wanted to not think at all.

I hated how backed into a corner I felt because of the whole situation, and I especially hated how my feelings seemed to betray me.

My mind was well aware of how damaging the situation could be for me over time, and yet, that desire in my heart just wanted to accept Alex and explore what could be between us if we only tried.

As I dropped myself onto one of the lounge chairs, I tucked my knees up to my chest and let go of a deep breath.The idea of just giving in and accepting the situation seemed somewhat easier since I didn’t have much choice anyway, but the thought of giving up on myself was too painful to bear.

Regardless of my conflicting emotions, it didn’t really matter how I thought of it. Either way, Alex had the reins, and I was still trapped in his scheme.

Chapter 13 - Alexander

Sitting in the living room, suddenly alone, I lost myself in disbelief for a moment.

In my mind, I had only tried to be a bit more playful with her; even if what I was saying had been true, I didn't mean anything else by it. It wasn't meant to be a big thing at all.

I assumed she would've been able to handle a joke a bit better since we slept together, but it seemed I was still excelling at saying all the wrong things.

Since she was my wife and it was in my best interest to gain her trust, I wanted to keep things lighthearted and show her that it didn't need to be so serious all the time. However, it backfired on me, and I was left to try and understand what exactly it was that set her off.

After thinking about her all day, I just wanted to be near her. To see her again and take a crack at getting to know each other better.

I was frustrated with her for getting up and leaving me abruptly. It felt disrespectful in a way, and I wasn't used to that kind of treatment. Nobody ever walked away from me like that without another word or explanation.

It left a bitter taste in my mouth and certainly bruised my ego.

Yet, on the other hand, I could at least begin to understand what she might've been going through. I knew the transition wouldn't be easy for her, but I was feeling impatient. I did buy and take her against her will, and forced her to marry me, regardless of my intentions. Because of that, I couldn't expect her gratitude.

As much as I didn't want to admit it, I changed everything for her, and quickly, at that.

Even if I was in control of the situation, the ball was really in Lara's court.

If her brothers managed to track us down and decided they didn't want to be too forgiving, she would potentially be the only thing standing between them and me. Her loyalty would be the only thing that could save me.

It wounded my pride even more to admit that, but that was the simple fact of it.

If I wanted to keep my life and my family, then I had to at least try and win Lara over.

With a huffed breath, I scrubbed a hand down my face and leaned against the couch.

Something in me was saying I should follow her and try to better understand her, yet I was also considering giving her space. To let her gather her thoughts and try again later.

But I considered how much worse it would be to continue feeling that coldness from her, and I knew I didn't want it to linger for too long.

While it was in my best interest to get her completely on my side, it was also something I just wanted. Regardless of how cold and distant I could be at times, I didn't want to be that way to her. I wanted to feel a sense of connection, even if our marriage wasn't completely honest. Despite having a typical advantageous mafia wedding, I wanted more than that for us. For her.

She had caught my eye and piqued my interest the first time I saw her, and I knew that had to count for something.

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