Page 68 of Don't Look Away

“Why did you fucking choose me, Roman?Tell me now,” she screams the last part, using the poker to punctuate her words. She’s fuckinglost it.

She wants the truth, but I can’t give it to her. She clearly knows something is up, but telling her the truth would set this whole thing on fire, and I can’t bring myself to do that.

“Lux, listen—” I say, but before I can even finish, she comes at me hot, lunging at me with the poker. The tip nearly catches me in the eye, but I manage to deflect it, then yank the metal rod out of her hand. Lucas takes the poker from me as I struggle to subdue her, but she’s clawing at me like a rabid she-cat.Jezus.

“You fucking asshole,” she screams, her blunt nails catching my face. White-hot pain streaks down my cheek, and I loosen my hold just long enough for her to break free.

She retreats several paces, the breath sawing from her lungs. There’s fire in her eyes, and I know for a fact, if she had a gun in her hand, I’d be so fucking dead right now. The hate in her eyes is visceral.

“Tell me what the fuck is going on,” I say, struggling to catch my breath. My face stings and I can feel blood dripping down my face.

“Yo, uh, Roman…” It’s Lucas. I glance over at him, but he’s not looking at me, he’s looking at the floor. I follow his gaze and see several papers scattered across the carpet. My brother’s booking sheet. The police report, outlining Lux’s attack. Her scholarship documents. Everything. It’s all there. Every dark secret I worked so hard to bury and keep hidden from her.

Fuck.

“You’re not the only one who can tear into people’s lives, and dig out their secrets,” she says, her tone dripping with vitriol.

When I look up at her, she’s staring at me, tears filling her eyes. The violent pain of my betrayal is written all over her beautiful face, and I’ve never hated myself more for doing this to her. I’m the coward my father always accused me of being, and the monster Lux always knew I was.

“Lux, let me explain.” There’s nothing to explain, I know that, but I’m desperate to make this right somehow. Even if that means lying to her one more time.

She takes a step back. “He’s your brother. James. My attacker. The man whotormentedme for months.” Her voice is slightly hysterical like she’s seconds away from slipping off the edge of sanity. “The man who raped me. The man who nearlykilledme.”

I take a step toward her, holding my hand out, like I’m approaching a wounded animal. “Lux, please…”

Grabbing blindly for anything within her reach, she starts throwing shit at me again. Priceless books, a bronze clock, another vase, they all whiz by my head, and by some miracle, I manage to dodge them all. Only when she’s run out of shit to throw does she seem to calm down a little.

“Tell me,” she says quietly, her chest heaving, the tears still falling. “Tell me why.”

Something inside me breaks. I feel fucking cornered, and I know nothing I say will take the pain away, and that, more than anything, fills me with rage. “Fuuuck!” I yell, shoving my fist into the nearest wall over and over and over until my knuckles are raw and bleeding.

It’s jackson who finally pulls me back. “Roman, stop, man.”

I shove him off me, turning to face the biggest mistake of my fucking life. “Fine,” I say, ready to fucking end this. “You want the truth, Lux? When my brother was arrested, he blamed you. He said you called the police to get back at him for breaking up with you.” I pull in a breath. Fuck. “So I designed a scholarship just for you, to bring you here to ExU. Then I chose you at the Preference Ceremony, so I could seduce you, and convince you to drop the charges against my brother,” I say in a rush. “That’s it. That’s all of it.”

She stands there in silence, just staring at me, barely breathing—and I swear to God, I’d give her the last breath in my body to know what she’s thinking right now.

“And Bree? Who killed her?”

I shake my head. “I don’t know. I swear.” But I’ve lied so much over the last few weeks, she’d be dumb to trust my word on anything.

“The plan was to get my brother out of jail. That’s it.”

Silence.

“I had to do it, Lux.Please…” I take several steps toward her, and she doesn’t move. “What would you do, huh? Tell me. What atrocities would you commit for someone you love?”

We’re close now, and she leans forward, pressing the tip of her finger into my chest. “What atrocities?Allof them.” A look of pure hatred crosses over her beautiful face, tightening those pink bow-shaped lips. “And if I find out you have anything to do with Bree’s death, Roman, I will fucking destroy youandyour entire-fucking-empire.

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