Page 21 of Securing Samantha

He opened the door and instantly became alert when he saw her face. He held a bag of peas to his privates while he ushered her inside.

“Have you seen Whiskey?” she asked, desperately hoping Shadow said yes.

“No. I returned from an assignment about an hour ago,” Shadow replied.

“Is Leo here? I can’t find Whiskey,” she told him in panic.

Shadow muttered a curse. He addressed his crotch, “Sorry boys, it looks like we aren’t getting any relief tonight one way or another.”

“Leo’s with Doc, what’s going on?” Shadow gently turned her to get a glimpse of her face.

“Liam served me divorce papers, today.” Her face crumbled as Shadow pulled her into a hug. She cried again. He rubbed her back soothingly. “We gotta find him. Shadow, what if…what if…”

“Don’t go there, we’ll find him,” he assured her.

He pulled out his phone and dialed Leo. When he didn’t pick up, he texted something to his leader. His phone immediately rang.

“Whiskey’s missing,” Shadow answered.

He listened to Leo barking instructions. “Got it, Boss.”

He took her by the shoulders. “Go home. I’ll head over to get a few of Victoria’s men and fan out. Saint, Taco and Leo can’t leave the job but Matthew will check if he used his debit or credit cards anywhere. I’ll call you when I find him. Whiskey’s stayed at the team building a couple of times over the last few days. Nothing indicated he intended to harm himself. He even went to Seattle today with Leo and got his license reinstated. If he planned on doing anything, he wouldn’t be worried about his driver’s license,” he told her.

“I can’t sit by the phone,” she told him.

“Stay here in case he comes back. The entry doors lock automatically. If you leave, make sure you take everything with you. You can’t get back inside.” Shadow walked funny as he ambled down the hallway to his room. He held the phone and barked orders to someone as he waved at her when he left.

Samantha sat at the kitchen table and tried to think of where Whiskey might go. She remembered slipping his phone in her back pocket and opened it up to find a password encrypted phone. She tried his birthday, the day he became a SEAL, and then she tried their wedding day. The phone sprang to life. She scrolled through the calls. Whiskey didn’t call anyone. All the calls shown belonged to the team, Kassie, and Claire.

She went through the texts. It felt like a major violation of privacy but if it saved his life, she’d apologize later. She read through Claire’s texts. He seemed to communicate better by texting his thoughts than in person. She stopped, reading the last few.

She doesn’t understand I can’t be the man she wanted anymore. I’m weak.

Another one popped up.

I don’t want to get close to LJ and scare him. I can’t control the triggers. I already scared my son once. I don’t want him to dread seeing me.

She pulled the next set of texts. Kassie texted her husband.

She’ll never understand if you don’t try to talk to her. Samantha loves you as Chase loves me. Nothing you tell her will change the way she feels about you.

Liam replied back.

She can’t love a monster. She deserves better. My son believes I’m a hero. I’d rather walk away than let him see me as a monster. He saw me try to hurt his mother. How can they forgive me if I can’t forgive myself?

She flipped to the next set of texts from Sharkey. The owner of the military bar the men visited on their return home from missions.

Damn glad you made it home, son. When you feel up to it, come by. The beers on me.

She grabbed her keys and coat. She left his phone on the kitchen table. She jumped in her car and raced to find her husband. The texts ran through her mind. She realized what he tried to convey to her. What her husband didn’t understand, was a small part of Liam still existed inside the man who returned home. His concern for her and her son proved it. Liam always took her feelings and safety into consideration when making decisions. When she told him of her pregnancy, he immediately delved into childproofing the house. She even found a book on childbirth in his bag. Now, if only she managed to convince him to find Liam inside himself.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Samantha parked a block from the bar frequented by the military. Sharkey’s ended up a tradition for the team when they returned. Usually, the women she knew didn’t attend as it became a way for the men to decompress before coming home. Liam hardly ever stayed very long. As if gravity pulled them together, she always sensed when his boots hit the ground and she counted the minutes until he stood in the door of their home.

Whiskey always strode in, and she ran into his arms. He held her tightly to him as she breathed in the smell of sandalwood from the soap she made for him. Liam’s breath hovered over her ear as he whispered softly, “Hello, Sunshine.”

She closed her eyes and soaked in the moment before replying, “Hello, my flame.” Liam’s hands slowly cupped her face as he leaned in and kissed her. The memory of how safe and loved she felt made her shake as she walked closer to the bar. The chances seemed slim of finding him there, but she felt compelled to check out every lead until she heard from Shadow.

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