Page 75 of Tide Over

But as I enter the bedroom, the excitement fizzles. The bathroom door is slightly ajar, the lights are all off, and the air is cool.

I slowly push the bathroom door open, and catch the reflection of the shower in the mirror. It’s running, but I don’t see Liam in there.

A chill settles deep inside me as I step into the room and look through the glass shower door.

Liam sits slumped against the wall, fully dressed, as water pours over him.

“What the fuck?” I rush forward and pull the shower door open. I drop to my knees in front of him as freezing cold water sprays over me. As I take his face in my hands, his skin feels icy, and red, vacant eyes stare back at me.

“Liam…” My chest tightens as I search his face, unsure if he’s even seeing me. It looks like he’s not even here right now.

He blinks slowly as his eyes finally focus on me, and he shivers violently.

I lean over and shut off the water, the cold stream finally ending, and brush his soaked hair away from his forehead.

“Liam,” I say again. “What… what’s going on?”

He shivers again, giving his head a slight shake like he’s trying to reconnect and come back to the present. My brow furrows as I watch him, an overwhelming worry taking over.

“Come on,” I say softly, rising to my feet and pulling him up with me. He follows, moving slowly as I guide him out of the shower. I grab a towel and tug at his soaked clothes. “Take these off.”

Liam doesn’t protest as he fumbles with his clothes, and his hands seem to move on autopilot. I quickly head into the bedroom and grab a pair of his sweatpants and a t-shirt from the dresser, trying to make sense of what I just saw. When I return, he’s drying himself off, his wet hair hanging over his eyes as he keeps them cast down.

I hand him his dry clothes, and when his eyes meet mine, the sadness in them has my breath catching in my chest. It’s deeper than I’ve ever seen. And it breaks my fucking heart.

He pulls on his clothes in silence, and I head back into the bedroom to quickly change out of my own wet clothes and try to stay calm. I’m not sure what this is… I’ve never seen him so distant, and… broken.

But I do know that vacant expression, because I’ve felt it before.

It’s escape. I just don’t know what he’s escaping.

When he steps out of the bathroom, his eyes find mine, and he searches them like he’s trying to figure out what to say and find the right words. But his look says it all. He’s hurting, and he needs help.

I step forward and pull him into my arms, holding him close against me. His cold skin presses against mine as his arms wrap around me, and his head falls to my shoulder. A mirror image of us yesterday morning, when he was the one comforting me.

We stay quiet as I hold him, and he hangs on tight.

Until he says, in a soft voice, "I called my parents."

My heart skips a beat. I don’t know what this means, but I know for Liam, it’s big. "Yeah?" I ask, trying to keep my voice calm.

He holds me a moment longer, then gently pulls back. His eyes are glassy with tears, and he just nods.

I push his hair away from his face, feeling the weight of everything pressing down on him. With his hand in mine, I leadhim to the bed and pull him down to sit with me. I’ve never wanted to push him to talk about this, and I understand why Liam is quiet with his pain… but now, I think he needs to.

“What happened?” I ask gently.

He stares at the floor as his fingers fidget and he picks at his nails. “They still love me,” he says quietly.

My brow furrows as I watch him, not sure what to make of that. “Is that a good thing?” I ask cautiously.

He nods slightly, then takes a shuddering breath. A tear rolls down his cheek, slow and heavy. I slide my hand into his and squeeze, urging him to look at me. His eyes finally meet mine, and the raw emotion in them almost breaks me.

“Liam… what’s going on?” I ask, some of the urgency I feel coming through in my words.

He holds my gaze for a moment before looking down at our joined hands. “My parents still think I’m in Alberta, and I haven’t talked to them, or Nick’s parents, since his funeral.”

I nod. He’s mentioned this before, and I can’t say I haven’t been wondering why he’s been avoiding them.

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