Page 18 of Phoenix Chosen 2

“B-beta?!” Jeff chokes.

I can’t help but feel sorry for him. Despite the suffering I’ve gone through on his account, it would be unfair of me to blame him for all of it. I was so desperate for him to choose me, but really, the problem was that I was never able to choose myself. I’d always known Jeff would never be able to give me what I wanted, but I’d never been able to let myself detach. I just kept allowing myself to believe my lies.

“It’s okay, Kalistratos,” I say, placing my hand on his back. “He means well.”

“Wait,” Jeff says. “You look familiar. Haven’t I seen you somewhere?”

Oh God. Kalistratos is probably plastered across every news channel for his assault and subsequent escape.

“Just… stop fucking shouting and come inside,” I groan, grabbing him and pulling him in. “I’ll try to explain what’s going on.”

Kalistratos and Jeff stand across from each other in my living room like a couple of wary dogs—or maybe it’s more like an edgy French bulldog versus a wild timber wolf. Kalistratos looks mildly annoyed but otherwise is as cool as a cucumber. Jeff looks like he’s doing his best to keep himself from having a mental breakdown.

“First off, yes, I was hit by a car yesterday,” I say. “But that’s pretty much the smallest thing that has happened to me recently.”

“Goddamn, Tyler. Why didn’t you call me?”

“Look… I’m going to be straight up with you. I didn’t call you because I didn’t think about you. I have a lot of shit going on, none of which involves you.”

“Okay, you’re mad at me,” he says. “I get it. Look, I’m sorry I didn’t get back to you about meeting up the other day. I was in Vegas with Tony and his boyfriend. But it doesn’t mean I wasn’t thinking about you the whole time.”

For a second, I’m confused about what he’s talking about. When I think about last week, the only thing that comes into my head is adventuring through a sun-drenched landscape with Kalistratos at my side and Alyx padding ahead of us while Airos cracks jokes as he gulps from his wine gourd. I remember pausing to enjoy the shade of an olive tree. Rolling hills peppered with wild herbs and flowers growing beneath cypress and oak, and a whitewashed village in the distance. Then I remember that here on Earth, “the other day” was my birthday. I’d sent Jeff a text message asking if he wanted to come over to celebrate, and had been left on read.

God. I’d been so hurt by that at the time, even though I’dknownit was going to happen. I always knew in my gut when I was setting myself up for disappointment. All of that seems like ancient history, like the fading memory of a rather intense dream.

“Jeff,” I say gently, “whatever it was that we had… It’s over now.”

He looks shocked and hurt. This would be the point where past me caves in and backpedals.

“Over? So… You meet this guy on, what, Grindr or some shit, and that’s it? I’m out of the picture?”

“Were we ever in the same picture together to begin with?” I ask. “Be honest with me.”

“I mean, I know I’ve been distracted. I know I’ve had a lot going on, especially with work, and like, I’ve been trying to go back to school, and…”

“Jeff.” My tone is firm, but not angry. “Be honest.”

He stares at me, then sighs. “Yeah. I guess not. I’m sorry. But if we?—”

I shake my head. “I’m not the same Tyler I was the last time you saw me. That Tyler is long gone. I know it doesn’t make sense, but it’s true.”

“Then, can you explain it to me? I want to understand. As your friend, please tell me what’s going on.”

How can I explain it to him without sounding like an absolute crazy person?

Fuck it. Does it really matter?

“You want the truth?” I ask.

“Give it to me.”

“I was transported to another universe and met Kalistratos, my soulmate, a phoenix shapeshifter.”

Kalistratos nods tersely at Jeff. “Hello.”

“I found out I was pregnant, and we were on our way to find the magical phoenix god who brought me to that world, but we got interrupted by some mystery sorcerer who sent us both back to Earth. And… now we’re trying to find our way back. Ta-da.”

Jeff’s forehead scrunches up. “Uh… Tyler? The doctors didn’t say anything about a head injury, did they?”

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