Page 19 of Everything I Desire

He releases a breath and leans down, nuzzling his face into my neck, and pulling me in for a hug. He squeezes me like I’m going to be the one to hold himtogether in this moment. I put my arms around his neck and inhale his scent.

“Working today, it brought up so many memories of when you’d come see me. And then coming in tonight, seeing you and her in the kitchen-”

All too quickly the front door opens and he is stepping away from me, realizing that he let his walls down for a moment too long with me.

“Oh, hey Uncle Porter! Guess what?” Kayla says as she bounces into the kitchen oblivious to the turmoil I feel at the absence of Porter.

Until he pulled away I could almost convince myself he might give us a chance to figure things out.

Porter, still staring at me, steps forward into the kitchen. “What? I’m the best Uncle in the whole world?” His smile back in place for her.

Kayla rolls her eyes, as much as she won’t admit it, she loves him. “No. Addy is going to teach me how to make your favorite dinner, chicken pot pie.”

“That is my favorite, while you girls cook I’m going to go grab a quick shower.” He backs out of the kitchen toward the stairs.

“Yeah, you smell like oil,” Kayla says, scrunching up her nose.

Porter stops and looks back at her. I used to say the exact same thing, only Kayla is none the wiser. She turns back around and starts pulling the vegetables out of the refrigerator to chop up like I had told her to do before Porter got home.

Porter is frozen on the stairs at the memory Kayla brought up. I walk over to him, taking his hand in mine.

“You’re worth it, Porter. Every day. Every flaw you think you have, you don’t. You need to stop beating yourself up.”

He gulps, trying to stave off the emotions he’s feeling right now.

“Seeing you, with her, in my kitchen,” he trails off.

“It could have been our future. It still can be,” I urge. “I’m not going anywhere.”

He doesn’t answer, he simply turns and goes upstairs.

I won’t let him do this, I won’t let him retreat back into himself with old memories. I need this man back in my life like I need air to breathe.

It’s been a few days since I’ve seen Porter. He has been working mostly and Kayla has been hanging out with a boy named Eric who asked her to go to the Spring Fling with her. So I didn’t even have that as an excuse to go over when Porter got home.

The Spring Fling is fast approaching, so tonight I’m headed to the school to work on some favors for the kids. I have all my boxes ready to go by the door when I hear a knock from the other side.

I open it to see Porter on the other side.

“Hey, what’s going on?” He looks angry as he pushes my door open and stomps his way into my house.

“Who the hell is this Eric kid?” he demands.

I can’t hold my laughter back. He’s really playing the protective dad card. “You’ve met him. He’s been over your house.”

“Exactly, baby. He’s been at my house with my niece, and you want to know what I walked in on last night?”

Oh jeez. I don’t know if I want to know.

“They were just there on the couch, making out!”

My laughter grows louder. “Making out? Oh no.” I feign horror by putting my hand over my mouth.

“This is not funny, Adelaide! It’s serious! He was kissingmybaby niece onmycouch. The disrespect!” He’s pacing my living room, about to wear a hole in my carpet.

“Porter. Stop.” I grab his hands to stop his pacing. “You can’t even be mad. You remember what Old Sheriff Miller caught you doing to me at the lake?”

He cringes. “That is totally different.” He knows it isn’t.