Page 73 of Protector

“Yeah, I catch him watching your show, looking at your pictures. I told him that guy is just arm candy and that it’s him you love.”

“That’s right!” I say firmly but too loudly. They both gape at me. “I mean… I don’t know what I mean.” We all leave a few beats of silence on the table. I sip my drink and then take a deep breath. “That’s not true,” I say, turning to Jade. “I do know. I love Brooks. With all my heart. Rio and I are just friends, and if it looks like anything more, it’s creative editing from the show.”

Jade’s smile goes wide, and she runs a hand through her short hair. “Damn, I knew it. I told him.” She shakes her head. “I know this isn’t the ideal situation for you, but if you really love my brother and want to be with him, you’re going to have to be the one to make the first move.”

For an instant anger fills me, but it’s a useless emotion, especially when faced with never seeing the person you love again. So, I push it down, finish off my drink, and give Jade a single nod.

CHAPTERTWENTY-SIX

Brooks

Halfway through my second read, I close the book Shay gave me that time I was staying in the casita. That first night, the instant connection she and I had… It won’t ever leave me, even if I never see her again. I know I fought my feelings every step of the way, but in hindsight, my heart knew Shay and I were meant to be together. Too bad fate is a heartless asshole, and I’m probably no better.

I set the book down on the nightstand and then grab the water bottle beside me. I take a long drink, remembering my sister’s words—“that better be empty when I get back”—before she left to “run errands.” Since I got home from the hospital, all she’s done is take care of me—at times annoyingly so. I have to admit it’s probably the one thing keeping me from falling apart.

I don’t know what kind of errands take all damn day, but when I asked, she told me to mind my own business. Being in the hospital with two gunshot wounds was humbling, not to mention it showed me I can’t be everything to everyone. And when I woke and saw my sister’s face, she wasn’t smiling. She was pissed. Told me I better not ever get my ass shot again. She also told me she’s done hiding from her ex. How did I end up with two such strong-willed women in my life? I let out a sigh at the slap of reality, of my thoughts being so untrue. Shay’s not in my life and has apparently moved on just fine. Of course, I can’t blame her one bit. I let her down. I broke my promise that that psycho wouldn’t touch her. And now she’s with Rio. And as much as it pains me to see her with him, I can’t stay away from her show, her social media, anything where I can see her angelic face, her gorgeous smile, and those amazing eyes.

The landline rings beside me, and I answer it.

“Hello?”

“You okay,” Jackson’s deep voice says over the line.

“Dude, you just saw me an hour ago.”

I appreciate him; I really do, but all this attention and care is making me feel like a damn child. I knew it wasn’t a coincidence when Jade left this morning that Jackson just happened to stop by.

“I know, man. I would’ve texted but… When you getting a new phone anyway?”

My old one was toast and probably saved me from a shattered hip. Aaron got one bullet off in my shoulder before both Harvey and I fired on him. Another shot went off and got me in the hip, my phone taking most of it. Harvey’s shot ended up being the fatal one, since I was injured and shooting from the ground, but I wouldn’t have had an ounce of regret if it was mine that took Aaron out. He took my whole world. My love. My Shay. Who knows what he would have done to her. The thought still haunts me day and night, and my gut still twists with guilt for not keeping Shay safe from him. “Tomorrow,” I say without thinking. I should have gotten a new one sooner, but I haven’t left the cabin since Jade brought me here from the hospital.

“Good. If you want, I can take you?”

“Naw, I’m good.” Though, my truck is a stick, and I’m not ready to drive just yet, but Jade will likely take me. “But I will take you up on beers soon.”

“All right. Text me when you get that phone. And take care of yourself.”

“See ya, buddy.”

I hear the door open just as I hang up, then Jade’s footsteps coming up the stairs.

I watch the doorway, and when Shay fills the space, my heart stops. For a second I can’t believe my eyes. Then she gives me a small grin, and my heart gallops in my chest. I’d leap from the bed, but I don’t know if my legs would give out on me—not just from my injuries—and my arm is still in a sling.

“Hey,” is all I can manage.

Yes, seeing her again is a sweet kind of torture, but I’m also confused by her presence.

Her eyes roam up and down my body as I sit up on the bed in sweats and a tank, slinged arm resting over my stomach.

“How are you?” she asks casually, as if neither of us is affected by this. I can see in the high rise of her own chest that’s not the case.

“I’m good. How about you?” And just as the words leave my mouth, I feel like the world’s biggest ass for not checking on her. I suppose when I hadn’t heard from her, I just assumed there was a reason, and it was for the best. Still, she might have sent me a message, but I don’t have the damn phone.

“I’m fine, thanks to you.”

I huff and clench my jaw, the confusion and elation at seeing her turning to bitterness. “Don’t, Shay.” Unable to meet her gaze, I turn to look out the window.

“Don’t what?” she says with an edge to her voice. “Say the truth? That no one would have protected me the way you did. That no one on this earth makes me feel safer than you?”

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