Page 46 of Protector

Flipping us so she’s on her back, I lean over her and slip her black panties down her thighs. Then I make quick work of my pants and shirt. As I hover over her waiting form, our eyes lock, and my free hand finds hers, lacing our fingers together before I slowly press inside her.

We move together, slowly and in sync, our gazes staying connected, as if we both want this moment to last. Neither of us know what will happen after this night, the odds of us making it not on our side.

The sight of her is so overwhelming it’s almost heartbreaking. I’ve never seen a woman look so beautiful, so emotional, and so sated all at once. And the way our bodies fit together, move to the beat of the same silent tune, feels hauntingly like a dream I never thought I could have.

Bringing my mouth down to hers, I capture the cries of her release, and she locks her legs around my hips. We soar together, so high I don’t know if this is real or a figment of my imagination. Our hips continue to move slowly against each other, as neither of us wants to acknowledge an end to what we just experienced together. And as our movements slow until they’re practically imperceptible, I work to contain the storm of thoughts and emotions peppering my mind and body. I focus on the feel of her body entangled with mine, her scent, and the comforting sound of deep breathing until soon my own breathing calms, and my mind turns to darkness.

CHAPTERSIXTEEN

Shay

With my cheek pressed against a wall of bare back muscle, I find myself smiling before I even open my eyes. That smile, the wonderful presence of achiness, and the solid body taking long deep breaths beside me tell me that last night was not, in fact, a dream.

As much as my heart soars at the memory of it all, especially the look in his eyes when we finally became one, I know the reality is that once he wakes up, this will all be over. So, I don’t dare move a muscle, as tempted as I am to press my lips into his back, to tighten the grip of my thigh around his waist.

Instead, I keep my eyes closed and replay every satisfying second of last night. Not that I’ve slept with a ton of men, but I’ve had my share…and nothing has ever hit me so intensely as being with Brooks did. And no matter what he says today, I know what I saw in his gaze.

When he stirs, my heart skips a beat. Mostly because I’m afraid of what he’ll say, but I’m also reminded of what pure perfection his body is as he rolls to his back and draws in a deep breath before saying, “Good morning.”

The groggy deep rumble of his voice does crazy things to me, and I’m tempted to show him what a great morning it can be. “Hey…”

“You’re blushing,” he says with a crooked grin.

“I am not.” Lying on my side facing him, I slip a hand under my cheek.

Brooks runs his fingers down the side of my face. “I don’t think I can restrain myself if you keep looking at me like that.”

Don’t, then. Please don’t.

Honestly, I don’t know what to say, so we just stare at each other for a few intense moments. I might have made the first move last night, but this time, I’m leaving it up to him. He needs to show me this is what he wants, and I pray he does.

“Shay…last night was…so incredible—you’reincredible.”

All the heat suffusing through my body suddenly cools. “Why does it sound like there’s abutcoming.”

On an intake of breath, Brooks’s mouth parts, and I cut him off.

“I don’t want to hear a fuckingbut, Brooks.”

My words sound so pouty I have to turn my eyes down, away from his concerned gaze.

I feel the bed jostling and turn to find him pushing up to a sitting position. “Listen to me. If I didn’t care so goddamn much about you, this would be easy.”

Giving myself some time to take that in, I sit as well, keeping the sheet tucked under my arms protectively.

“Shay, there’s just so many reasons—”

“No,” I finally say. “That’s bullshit. Those are your reasons, not mine.”

He shakes his head, reaches over and puts a hand on my knee. “Don’t you get it? My number one priority is keeping you safe. I should have never let last night happen. I need to stay focused on the job…”

I look down at my hands, afraid to ask my next question. “Then what happens when the job is over?”

There’s a long beat of silence as my heart hangs in the balance. Then I feel his fingers under my chin, and he nudges it up until I look at him.

“I’m sorry, Shay. I just don’t know. Maybe this will sound like bullshit to you, but you and I…we’re”—he stops and runs a hand through his hair—“no, we’re actually not that different, but you should be with someone, I don’t know, better, younger. I’m old enough to be your…uncle,” he says and gives me a squinty grin.

I don’t even know what to say. He clearly can’t see us together, and I’m blown away that such an amazing man can’t see himself how I do. How so many others do. “I’ll be honest, Brooks, I hate hearing you say that. I don’t give a damn about any of that. Besides, I think I can decide for myself what I want.”

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