Page 96 of Resist Me

I flashed him a smile. “Never. That doesn’t sound like me.”

He snorted. “Let’s not talk about the time you convinced the entire football team to bring cans of silly string to prom and whip them out during the first slow song.”

“That was badass.”

“Until you sprayed Principal Baker in the face.”

“Without his sight, he couldn’t pinpoint which direction I ran. It was tactical. He yanked me out of class Monday, but it was worth it.”

I continued to laugh, but in my mind I saw myself sitting on my bed after school, knowing that the principal called my dad. It wasbetter to just deal with it than try to avoid him, so I waited for him to get home. He backhanded me so hard that my vision got spotty. Then, he went to his room and slammed the door without saying a single word. He didn’t have to. I knew all that I needed to know just from looking at his face.

“Did your mom decide to come?” I asked.

Kai’s face changed noticeably. Even though he tried not to show it most of the time, his dad’s illness weighed on him more and more. He felt guilty for being here while Alzheimer’s took him. Every time he went home, he’d be worse but like his mom told him, being there wouldn’t help anything and it would only give him more painful memories instead of good ones. His dad wanted him here, which might have been the only reason he stayed.

“They’re both coming.”

I faltered a little at the news. “Really?”

He nodded. His lips rolled a few times before he responded. “We’re going into it expecting him not to make it to the dinner, but he’ll be here. If things are good that day, he’ll come, at least for a little bit. They have a nurse that’ll be with him too.”

“Wow. That’s good, though. Even if he can’t go, you’ll get to see him.”

“Yeah, they’ll be here for that whole weekend. Mom’s excited to see Sen.”

“She loves him. Every time we talk, she asks about both of you because she doesn’t believe that either of you would tell her if something was wrong.”

“Ugh. She’s a meddler.”

“Just like you.”

He stuck his tongue out, then laughed. “Enough about me. Are you and Linc going together, as intogether?”

“Mm. Sounds like none of your business. But maybe if he asks me to, I’ll consider it. No promises.”

“Why don’t you ask him?”

“Because I’m a delicate little flower and I haven’t been given time to bloom. He’s the experienced one, so he gets daddy privileges until I decide I want them back. What are you doing?”

He was texting furiously and it was super suspicious. After he slipped his phone into his pocket, he held his hands up, waiting forme to throw the ball. I narrowed my eyes but decided to let it be. I was all about being Zen these days.

Chapter 32

Linc

Kai:You’ll make West blush like a little girl if you ask him to the team dinner. He’ll be a dick about it, but he’ll secretly love it.

Great. Kai was giving me West advice now. I had to admit that it was helpful, though. He was harder to read than a half-faded ancient Greek tablet. One second, he was fun and bubbly, then he was angry and prone to throwing hands, then suddenly he’d be soft and sweet. He was like a damn sour patch kid.

I did want to invite him to the dinner, to gowithme. It wasn’t that I hadn’t thought about it. I just kept going back and forth. Going public with him didn’t bother me, even though I hated having the amount of attention on me that would garner. It was more that I was afraid we’d do all of that, then he’d bail.

West was flighty- a self-sabotager who was afraid of deep emotions. He didn’t have an issue with loving people. He did that deeply and unapologetically. It was letting people love him in return that made him freak out. I’d seen it even when I did simple things like tell him I want to lie in bed with him instead of practice. It was a different kindof vulnerability to be on the receiving end of love because there was danger in getting too comfortable.

My heart constricted when I thought about it. He knew firsthand that love could be taken away. If the person who should have loved him more unconditionally than anyone else could so forcefully withdraw it, how could he not question every bit of affection, every touch, every kind word? It made me feel more angry than I’d expected.

I’d ask him this week. If he got weird about it, I’d just have to drop it. Then, I’d bring it up an hour later. Eventually, his attitude would chill out enough to let him say yes. Maybe I’d have to do it after we had sex, but I only had about a thirty second window before he became a pain in the ass again.

God, I’d never had to work so hard for something before, and we weren’t even dating.

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