Page 3 of Everything I Need

I can’t wait to be home, snuggled on mom’s couch watching movies with her, and eating some of her homemade cookie dough. Yes, some comfort food and time with Mom is just what I need. Maybe at the same time I’ll be able to figure out what to do with my life. I let out a long breath I'd been holding that whole conversation, a weight lifted off my shoulders now that I have a semi-plan.

I pack my bags with all my personal belongings so that I can leave tomorrow.

How sad is it that my whole life can fit in two suitcases?

In the morning I will call the rental agency and negotiate a price for them to buy all my furniture. Renting apartments fully furnished is a definite plus for all these corporate executives so the agency will be all too happy to have me leave my things. Now, if I could just keep myself calm, I might not have another panic attack.

I made plans last night to meet Lexis for coffee before I leave, so I grab all my things and head to our favorite coffee shop one more time.

Lexis and I found this shop on one of our lunch breaks together. I helped the owner, Nico, with some promotions he wanted to start, off the books of course, and I’ve never been anywhere else for coffee since. I really love helping small businesses grow.

I struggle to get my suitcases through the door, and hold the door open, and basically try to hold my whole life together. I get to the counter to order and let out an already exhausted breath before ordering my usual, an iced caramel macchiato.

We head to our table once we get our orders. I tuck my stuff in the corner, and sink into the big, puffy chair. A purchase I convinced Nico to make to increase the time his customers spend in the shop.

"Ok, give me all the gossip!" Lexis claps her hands in front of her, eager to hear what has been happening.

I fill her in on all the details of how I quit and plan to now escape to the mountains in New Hampshire.

“Ugh, he’s hot but such a jerk. Of course he promoted Jameson.” She pretends to be mad for me, but I know she not so secretly has a thing for Niles.

“I don’t know, maybe this is the kick I needed to quit and start my own business in New Hampshire like I have wanted for years.” I’ve just been too scared to actually do it.

We finish our coffee with Lexis telling me all about her very active social life. Turns out she knows Jameson’s sister and has been hanging out with all of them lately. So much for loyalty, she never even told me about the situation. I’d be willing to bet she knew about Jameson’s promotion and didn’t even bother to give me a heads up.

Luckily it’s time to leave for the bus station, so I don’t have to sit here and pretend not to be angry.

"Thanks so much for meeting me Lexis, but I've got to go so I can make the bus." I stand and she lunges up for a hug.

We say our goodbyes and promises, in the fake way people do, to keep in touch. But I know if I don’t reach out, neither will she.

I grab one more coffee to go, it is going to be too long to go without my favorites. The diner in Lupine Valley isn’t known for its coffee as much as it’s known for the latest in small town gossip.

"My girl! You are leaving me?" Nico questions with his thick Greek accent.

"I am. I'll come back to visit though; you can't keep me away!"

He pulls me in for a big bear hug you'd expect from a grandfather.

I am really going to miss Nico, the owner, and told him that he can call me anytime for help and I’ll be here for him. As sad as it sounds, I think he is the person I’m closest to in the city, and it’s only because of the work I’ve helped him with.

After a long night of fitful sleep, and three hours in an uncomfortable bus seat that smells like cigarettes and body odor, I am finally able to stand and stretch and breathe in some fresh air.

I arrive at the bus station in New Hampshire, a little more frantic than I was before I left Boston. My panic over my career has done little to help me figure out what I’m going to do next, but it definitely helped me realize all the negative consequences my impulsive decisions have.

What about my clients?

Most of my clients were only with the marketing firm to work with me. I’ll be damned if I let Niles take my clients from me. So, I spent almost the entire ride copying contacts of my favorite clients I’d built relationships with. Maybe when I know what I’m doing I can salvage some of those relationships. I know Niles will spin this so it appears to be my fault, and not his sexist ways of doing business, so I know I might have some work ahead of me with salvaging those client relationships. Luckily he isn’t smart enough to make me sign a non-compete, so I’m free to take my clients wherever I end up.

If they'll follow me.

I knew this last-minute trip would be cutting it close for Mom to be here when I arrived, so I am prepared to sit and wait awhile, but there she is. All smiles and arms out ready for a hug.

Mom stands in the lobby of the bus station with her arms open.

I sink into her embrace when I get to her. Relishing the feel of a mother’s hug before pulling back.

“Sweet Scarlett. It is so good to see you.” Mom grabs one of my bags and walks toward the car, “I have something to tell you that I’ve been keeping from you.”