Page 12 of Everything I Need

“Okay, what is wrong with clean?” she asks with a half smile, but is still clearly exasperated with me.

“Nothing is wrong with clean. I just hated how the hospital was always white, sterile, and smelled so much like stale bleach. I don’t want that for my office. I want people to feel comfortable and welcomed. Gray just seems cold.”

I hope that makes sense to her.

“Great, now that I know that, we can find a gray with a warm undertone so that it isn’t that sterile feel of the hospital. We can use pillows and accent furniture with a bright pop of color to offset the gray on the wall and still look clean. As far as the smell, we want something fresh, but we can’t use flowers in case you have anyone with severe allergies. Maybe we could get some essential oil diffusers?” She is typing furiously on her laptop as she talks and I’m impressed.

“All of that sounds wonderful. I love the idea that my office will feel homey to my patients. I want them to feel comfortable and safe with me.”

“Perfect. Mom is a great seamstress so I think we can keep most of your furniture and have her sew covers for the chairs. They’ll be fabric, but we can always add a zipper so they’ll be easily removed for cleaning. Did you have a color scheme in mind?”

“I don’t really know much about decorating but I like earthy neutral colors. Greens I guess?” I shrug as she watches me.

“That’s exactly what I envision for you. You seem very outdoorsy still and I think we should definitely play off your personality. We could even contact some local artists for paintings of outdoor scenes from around New Hampshire to tie in those colors.”

“Wow. I never would have done half of this.” I must have said something right because she straightened her back and did a little dance in the seat with the brightest smile I’ve ever seen from her.

God, I miss being the one to make her smile.

“I also think we should document this all on your social media. People love to see behind the scenes and transformations.” Now she seems to be searching her phone for something. Her mind must be working faster than her. I remember when she would get excited her mind would have plans before she even knew what they were.

Now it was my turn to confess my business sins to her. “Well, I actually don’t have any social media accounts for the practice. I was so busy trying to learn from Dr. Kramer and build relationships with the patients that I didn’t really do much else. I also don’t even have any personal accounts anymore.”

“Okay. That can be good. I won’t have to go through and delete anything that won’t be on brand for you. I can just start fresh. I am going to go ahead and create a presence on all social media platforms for you tonight. We should start off each with a photo of you outside the office announcing the new ownership.”

“Sounds great, we can do that now?” I am trying to get more time with her. This morning has been going well and she seems less standoffish with me. I’m hoping it's not just because we are working together.

This meeting reminds me of all the times we would study together in the library. Scarlett would always show up with snacks for us, and we’d laugh so hard at my anatomy textbooks like teenagers that the librarian would always shush us. Then we’d end up finding somewhere for me to practice anatomy lessons on her. Those were always my favorite times with her. Scarlett could make any ordinary moment into an extraordinary one just by being with her.

I hope she still feels even a fraction of what I feel for her, the smallest bit of hope that I can work with. And based on how I’ve caught her staring more than a few times, I think my chances are good.

But first, I owe her a huge apology and just as big an explanation.

Chapter Eight

Scarlett

Myemotionsarehaywireafter that meeting! Being close to Preston for that long again, it reminds me of all the reasons I fell in love with him, makes the anger I’m holding slip away, but only until I’m not intoxicated by his scent. Seriously, what is in his cologne?

I’ve never needed a girls night with Addy more than I do right now. She is the best listener, and sometimes I take her advice. Sometimes.

When Scott came over to see Mom, I took that as my cue and hightailed it to Addy’s house.

We are set up on her deck outside with our pizza from Walter, and ice-cream is on standby in the freezer. The Edison bulb lights she has strung around the railing give off a soft glow on the evening and we can enjoy the sunset.

“Addy, I’m telling you. That man is dangerous for me. I want to hate him, I want to stay mad at him for what he did, but everything I love about him is still there. Oh, and did I mention he’s way better looking than I remember? The last five years have done that man some favors.” I may have spent more time than I want to admit staring at the way his body has hardened over the years. He must spend a lot of time at the gym, and that meant I spent a lot of time squeezing my thighs together after imagining what his body must look like under his business attire.

“Scarlett, Mom and I both have told you that you need to give him a chance to explain. You two seriously have some chemistry and it would be a shame if you didn’t let him explain what happened. He’s actually been really sweet to Mom since he moved to town and took over the practice. Something about our situation really seems to have changed his beliefs in medicine.”

“It’s been so long, Addy. I never let him explain anything. Why would he want to now? Why would I want to let him? He had another woman wrapped around him, kissing him.” I reason with her to see my side.

“Scarlett, there’s always a reason to let someone explain. Even if you don’t want to get him back, which, based on your lack of dating history, and how much you are worried, I don’t believe for one second that you don’t. You do want to work with him. And that right there is a perfect reason to have the hard conversation.”

I hate when she’s right. Preston isn’t innocent in this, he should have never let himself be in a situation that needed to be explained, but I also should have been mature enough to let him try.

“Okay, Addy. You’re right. But what do I do? Do I just ask him what happened? We were so close before all this happened and now it’s just been so long. Is there a time limit for that kind of conversation?”

“Funny you should ask that. Mom and I might have already concocted a little plan.” Her smile is wide, too wide for me to not worry about this plan.

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