Page 74 of One Big Little Secret

For a second, I’m worried.

But then I hear Arlo laughing hysterically. Patton’s deep chuckle fills the air along with him. He’s holding my boy, narrowly preventing him from faceplanting into the snow.

Hello, core memory.

I’m sad that I’m the only one who knows just how special it really is.

And it’s the proof I’ve been dreading. Patton Rory can handle a child, and that means he can be a dad.

You need to tell him.

Not right away, but sooner or later, he should know.

The thought makes me queasy.

Still, can’t ignore it as they walk back up the hill toward me, Patton dragging the sled behind him. I can’t unsee what I’m looking at now.

Father and son.

Together and happy.

Spending quality time together like it’s normal for the first time in their lives.

Like they already know, at some basic instinctive level, which makes me feel like even more of a shitty villain.

My throathurts.

“I think he’s had enough. We should go warm up,” Patton tells him when they reach the top of the hill. “You ready, little man?”

“Moooom.” Arlo tugs at my hand. “Do we have to?”

“If Patton says it’s time to break, then yes, it’s time.” And I want to leave just as much as I want to stay. Talk about difficult.

“There’s cocoa waiting in the car. The good stuff from my mother,” Patton says, and Arlo sprints off at top speed.

His enthusiasm for the snow is only rivaled by his chocolate addiction.

I head back to the SUV stubbornly even though it feels like Patton wants to say something else. The steel wool lodged in my throat probably makes my face look weird, and I don’t want him asking why.

Then there’s no hiding the tears.

“Hey,” Patton says, surprisingly gentle. “Are you feeling okay? You look a little frozen.”

“Me?” My voice cracks. “Oh, no, I’m good. This wind just sucks, it makes my eyes water after a while. Totally the cold. Guess I’m more sensitive than I thought.” Yes, I’m babbling, but I don’t know how to stop. “It’s nothing to worry about. Ask anyone and they’ll tell you—”

When the world starts tilting, I don’t have time to gasp.

My heel skids on an ice patch and I’m spinning.

There’s just a second of panic, my arms windmilling, a squawking noise leaving my mouth.

Patton catches my arm right before I hit the ground and heaves me into him.

Into his arms.

I hold on before I can think what I’m doing, before my brain catches up.

Before I even realize I’m clutching Patton’s strong shoulders and his hands are on my waist, holding me steady.

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