Page 35 of Broken Hearts

“Fuck, I don’t know, Alana,” I say, frustrated. “But we hung out yesterday and managed not to fight, so I dunno. I guess we’re friends now.”

That much is true. As is the fact I told her things I’ve never told anyone but Mitch. Not even Alana or Kai and Miles know all the details about my past. And even though Mitch and Tanner were best friends, I’m pretty sure he never said anything to him either.

All of which begs the question of why I said anything to Sage, a woman I barely know and who only a few short days ago showed up and completely messed up my life.

As soon as I think that though, the memory of that kiss rears up again, reminding me that it’s not all bad with Sage. That actually, that kiss with her, the way she tasted, the sounds she made, was all pretty fucking good.

And I’d really like more of it.

I lookover my shoulder and find Nate and Alana watching me, and when I do, Nate quickly whips his head the other way, making it very obvious they are talking about me.

Did he tell her he kissed me? Did he say why he did? Because that’s the question that’s been running through my head since it happened.

A few days ago, I was certain he hated me, possibly sleeping with one eye open out of fear he was going to send my mattress adrift out on the Pacific, and now, he’s kissing me.

We were drunk. I’m chalking it up to drunkenness, even if by that point we were both sober. It was the alcohol, and boredom, loneliness. He was just comforting me after finding those childhood pictures my dad kept. But, for real, who kisses someone out of comfort, someone they at one point seemed to hate? Maybe it’s Hawaiian tradition to kiss.

I’m grasping here, my heart beginning to race as I think about the way his lips felt against mine. Soft and warm, comforting and gentle, and a part of me never wanted it to stop. I want it to happen again. I want to walk over there and pull him to me, wrapping my arms around him, begging him to kiss me like that again. I want him to take my breath away, to make my knees weak, to make my heart drum in my chest at a pace that only a kiss can do.

The moment his lips touched mine, it made me forget the sadness I’ve carried with me since I arrived here. It made me want to feel more, feel more with him.

Now as I’m standing here in my dad’s shop, all I can think about is Nate shirtless, something I’ve seen often, and my brain is now filling in what he looks like without shorts on.

“Sage!” Alana calls out, startling me. Shit, I hope my mouth wasn’t hanging open, obviously ogling Nate. What I can’t do is call my mother, because while I’m sure Alana knows nothing, my mom will hear it in my voice immediately.

“Yeah,” I reply, feeling the sweat build under my arms, like I’ve been caught doing something naughty. And I guess in a way, I have been, picturing Nate naked.

“Got any plans later?” she asks, hands on her hips, her long dark hair piled high on top of her head. She couldn’t look more native and surfer than if she were intentionally cast in a surfing movie.

“No. I don’t even know anyone here,” I say, trying a joke to distract from my thoughts.

“Yeah, you do,” Nate barks out, almost sounding insulted.

I swallow hard, my thoughts back as I take in his gorgeous face. I’m drawn to him, and not just because of his looks. He has this tragic backstory, and all I want is to see him smile. He lost my father, the only man who seemed to care about him, and that breaks my heart.

“Um, so yeah,” I reply, my words shaky, and there’s no way he doesn’t realize I’ve literally been thinking about him all day. “Sorry, I do have friends here,” I add, sounding like I’m desperately trying too hard. “I don’t have any plans later.” As the words leave my mouth, I catch Nate watching, his shoulders visibly sagging with my answer.

Guess I’m not the only one thinking about what happened last night. I wonder if he regrets it. I don’t and given the chance to be alone with him again, I’ll do everything in my power to make it happen. Besides the obvious. I don’t want to be obvious.

I’m pretty sure I’m already there, my gaze hanging on him now.

“Cool, I’ll come by and get you, and we can walk over to my place,” Alana says, smiling at me. “You’re not invited.” She directs her comment at Nate, who rolls his eyes and tosses a bird her way as he walks back toward the office.

“God, he’s so dramatic,” Alana now says, matching Nate’s eye roll. “How’s seven work for you? I’ll have dinner ready. Nothing fancy. You good with chicken long rice?”

My face must give me away, not even sure what chicken long rice is, but I still give a little nod, which only makes Alana let out this melodic laugh.

“It’s Hawaiian. It’s good. You’ll like it, and if you don’t, we can order pizza,” she replies, shrugging. “So, see you at seven."

“Sounds good,” I say, checking my watch, noticing I still have a few hours to kill before she comes back. And with that, return my thoughts of kissing Nate.

Alana heads out the back door, leaving Nate and me alone in the shop, alone with my thoughts, alone with that kiss on replay in my head.

I liked it, but a part of me thinks I shouldn’t have. Nothing can happen between us because how the hell could that even work. I live in New York. I love my life there, and my mom’s there and school and my friends and my apartment.

I’m getting way ahead of myself. It was just a damn kiss. Innocent and possibly drunken.

But if I was sober, then he was sober.

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