Page 36 of Be My Traitor

What could it mean? The fact that Lucas was hiding something didn’t surprise me. As the heir to House Knight, I was used to dealing with people who had secrets and at this stage in our relationship, of course there were going to be things I didn’t know about him. He’d been gone for years. A lot could happen in that time.

What could be so serious that someone would go out of their way to send me an anonymous note though? It had to be something they thought was important, something that would make a difference to the way I felt about Lucas.

I was so engrossed in thought, I didn’t hear the doorbell at first. It was only when someone leaned on it, making the shrill bell ring constantly that I jolted out of my reverie. Quickly, I folded the note and tucked it into my jeans’ back pocket. I answered the door and found Lucas and Amber waiting for me.

“There you are, Mummy.” Amber skipped into the house. “What took you so long?”

“I’m sorry, sweetie. Mummy was in the middle of something. Did you have a good day?”

“It was thebest!” Amber launched into a long, detailed description of everything she’d done, but I wasn’t really paying attention. Fortunately, four-year olds don’t always notice when your mind’s elsewhere and the occasional “uh-huh” seemed to be enough for her to think I was listening.

Lucas wasn’t so easily fooled. “What’s wrong, Milly?”

“Not now.” I shook my head a little, gesturing at Amber with my head to let him know we could talk once she was out of the way. That took a little longer than expected. The novelty of having her father around was far from wearing off and she insisted on having Lucas help her with everything which took twice as long as normal. Amber really knew how to milk the moment for every piece of attention possible.

By the time she was tucked up in bed and we could talk I was exhausted and in no real state to have a serious conversation. I couldn’t put it off though. I had to know what the note was about.

“I don’t know how you do it,” Lucas said, as I put the coffeemaker on. “Amber’s amazing but she’s exhausting! She’s non-stop energy. One day and I’m struggling. I don’t know how you’ve managed on your own all these years.”

“I’m not on my own,” I said. “Claire is a huge help, and my parents will take Amber whenever I need. Yes, it was exhausting in the early years, but after a while you get used to being permanently tired and it’s just your new normal. I can’t imagine what life would be like without her. Heck, I can’t even remember what I used to do at the weekend before Amber came along. Probably slept all day and partied all night. I look back at my younger self and I wish she’d known what I know now. I’d have done so much more with that time.”

“I don’t know. I think you did all right,” Lucas told me. “Most people with your background would have lived off the family money, but you went and qualified as a teacher and you’ve spent years helping your community.”

“I’d rather be in a classroom than an office,” I said. “Besides, Dad thought it would be a good idea for me to get experience outside the family business. Plus he said that if I can make positive connections with other Houses by being a good teacher, it’ll help me further down the line when I take over.”

“He’s got a good point,” Lucas said. “I always thought your father was the most effective of all the House leaders. Firm but fair, he’s the reason the Knights always do well in their business dealings.”

“It’s a lot to live up to.” I sighed. “I’ll be honest. There’s been plenty of times I wished Archer hadn’t stepped down as heir. He’d be so much better than me.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself.” Lucas stepped forward and cupped my face in his hands so I had to look at him. “Your father knew what he was doing. He had plenty of children to pick from and he chose you because he knew that your compassion would help you make the right decisions while your intelligence would help you keep a clear head. You might not see it yourself, but I think you’ll be a better head of House than Archer could ever be.”

“Thanks.” I smiled thinly and turned away, breaking our contact. It was lovely having someone to make me feel better when I doubted myself, but that note had made all my past fears resurface. Lucas always had a hidden agenda. How could I believe he truly meant what he said? “I’m going to make my coffee Irish. Do you want one?”

“Sure.”

The coffeemaker had worked its magic and I poured out two cups. I added a sugar and a generous splash of whiskey to them both and topped them up with cream. I passed one to Lucas then led the way to the front room, where I sat in my favourite comfy armchair. If Lucas was disappointed that I hadn’t sat on the couch so we could be next to each other he didn’t show it as he sat on it by myself.

I cupped my coffee in my hands, staring at the creamy topping gently swirling around. Steam curled up, creating a mesmerising effect that gave me an excuse not to look at Lucas. All this talk of taking over the business from my father only reminded me how much I still had to learn before I could be confident taking over the helm. I hated confrontation, always had, which is why I was waiting to mention the note to Lucas but putting it off was only going to make things worse.

“Milly, I-“

“There’s something I-”

We laughed awkwardly as we both spoke at the same time.

“You go.” I gestured to Lucas.

“No, ladies first. What were you going to say?”

I inhaled deeply, slowly exhaling through my mouth. “I need to ask you about something and I need you to be honest with me.”

“Sounds ominous.” Lucas smiled.

“It is,” I said.

Lucas’s smile faded. “Whatever it is, Milly, I promise you I’ll be truthful with you.”

“What does this mean?” I took the note out from my jeans pocket and gave it to him.