Page 29 of Be My Traitor

“Sorry.” Lucas grimaced apologetically at me. He went back to his seat on the other side of Amber. She started to eat her pizza, her eyes never leaving the screen as Moana sang about how much she loved her home and her parents but still wanted to explore the world beyond her island. I couldn’t help myself mouthing along with the words. I’d heard the song so many times I could practically sing it backwards, but Amber never got tired of it and I had to warn her not to sing with her mouth full otherwise she’d have been doing her very best Chloe Auli’i Cravalho impression.

WhenMoanahad finished and the pizza was all gone, Amber insisted on watchingFrozen 2.I’d always thought it was a better film than the original, so I was glad she picked that one to show Lucas as I slouched back in the seat and closed my eyes. Another film I’d seen so often I could recreate it in my mind without needing to see the screen, I’d often used this excuse as a cover for taking a sneaky afternoon nap when Amber had worn me out, the two of us snuggling up together in my bed to watch a film together.

“You okay?”

I opened my eyes again as Lucas gently nudged my shoulder.

“Fine,” I said.

“It’s just that you were snoring…”

“I was not!” I looked over to see thatFrozen 2was almost over. It was entirely possible that I had actually been asleep and I blushed.

“It’s okay. Amber’s out for the count so you didn’t ruin her enjoyment of the show.”

I looked down to see Amber curled up against Lucas, her head in his lap.

“You know you’re stuck there for the next few hours, don’t you?” I smiled.

“I don’t mind. It’s nice that she feels relaxed enough with me to do this,” Lucas said. “It’s the perfect end to the day. It’s been good, hasn’t it?”

“Yeah. It has.” I could almost kid myself we were a normal family. “Even though you’re going to break her heart when you tell her the pony has to go.”

“Nah.” Lucas shook his head. “George and me are best friends. He’s not going anywhere. Besides, what I didn’t tell you earlier is that he doesn’t actually live here. His regular home is at a stable not far from where you live so you can take Amber to see him whenever she likes. So you see you didn’t have to worry about how he was going to be taken care of. I’d already sorted it.”

“You could have told me.”

“Icould… But then I wouldn’t have had the fun of seeing you get all worked up in righteous indignation at the thought I would randomly buy a high maintenance animal just to impress a four-year-old.”

I opened my mouth to argue then closed it again. “I suppose I deserve that,” I said at last. “I’m sorry, Lucas. This is hard for me. I’m doing my best.”

“I know. It’s hard for me too,” Lucas said. “Discovering I had a daughter I didn’t know about was a real shock and the chances are high I’m going to mess up at this parenting thing more than once. That’s why I need you to tell me when I get it wrong – but also cut me some slack and don’t assume the worst. I’m doing my best to make this work.”

“Yes. You are. And I appreciate it.”

For a moment, I thought Lucas would lean over to kiss me, but Amber snorted and writhed a little in her sleep, reminding me of the child between us.

Another time.

“Look, I know it’s not what we agreed, but would the two of you like to stay overnight?” Lucas asked. “I’m happy to wake Amber up and drive you both home if that’s what you prefer, but it seems silly when there’s a bedroom literally with her name on it upstairs. I have plenty of spare rooms you could use.”

I looked down at Amber. She looked so peaceful sleeping there. Much as the sensible thing to do would be to assert my boundaries and go home, I hated the idea of disturbing her as much as Lucas seemed to.

“We’ll stay,” I decided.

Chapter 12

Lucas tucked Amber up in her four-poster bed. She’d barely stirred when he’d moved to pick her up and as he dropped a gentle kiss on her cheek, she smiled in her sleep but didn’t open her eyes.

We tiptoed out of her room together and Lucas quietly pulled the door shut behind us. He gestured to me to follow him and he led me to a room a couple of doors down. Opening it, he revealed a simply furnished bedroom.

“This is where you’ll sleep tonight. Unless…”

“Unless what?”

“You could stay in my room if you prefer.”

He looked at me, trying to keep his expression neutral, but he was unable to keep the hope out of his eyes.

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