Page 60 of First Comes Marriage

It shouldn’t have bothered him that much, but that pinched look on her face now, here, made him itchy all over, like he couldfeelthe things she wasn’t saying.

They hadn’t talked about what happened in her parents’ guest room, the things he’d said to her, the boundaries they’d blown right past. Yesterday as they’d driven home, each mile that brought them closer to Aster Bay also pushed them further apart. By the time they’d arrived back at his condo, the awkward weight of all the things they weren’t saying was a physical presence between them.

So even though he’d wanted to protest when she’d said goodnight and slipped into the guest room with a shy smile, he hadn’t. Because she didn’t owe him anything. The only modification to their previous arrangement had been an agreement to indulge in their physical attraction to each other, to act like fucking idiotic teenagers and pretend he could be fuck buddies with his wife.

No, you agreed to enjoy it while it lasts. Stop being such a whiney fucking asshole and enjoy it.

The ride attendant secured the door on the Ferris wheel car and the ride slowly began to spin, bringing them higher and higher. But Baz didn’t care about the view. He cared about what had put that look on Sabrina’s face. What wasn’t she telling him?

“Seemed like you were having a good time with Kyla and Tessa,” he said.

“They’re great,” she confirmed. “All your friends are.”

“They’re your friends too. If you want them to be.”

“Maybe they won’t want to be my friend when they find out we’ve been lying to them.” She flashed him a small, apologetic smile. It was almost worse than the pinched lips.

“The lie is a technicality,” he said, but even he didn’t believe it.

“I’m not sure they’ll agree.”

He blew out a frustrated breath. “We’re married. That’s not a lie.”

“No, but—”

“Anything else is between us. We decide what’s true.”

It was Sabrina’s turn to make a frustrated sound. “That’s not how truth works.”

“Then tell me what’s true, Sabrina. You’re living in my apartment. That’s true. You’re wearing my ring. Your name is next to mine on the goddamn insurance forms. That’s true, isn’t it?”

She ran her eyes over him appraisingly, like she could see what had crawled under his skin and made him irrationally adamant. But it washer—her wildflower scent and her auburn hair and her fucking freckles and the little huff sound she made when there wasn’t enough cereal left in the box for a whole bowl and all her goddamn flirty little skirts and justher.

Something in her eyes shifted, as though she’d heard his thoughts, and maybe she had. Maybe the way she was seeping into all the cracks in his life and filling them up was written all over his face, how badly he wanted more from her, and how much he hated himself for that. Maybe she already knew.

Maybe she felt the same way.

“Yeah, Sebastian,” she said, her tongue flicking out to wet her lips. “That’s all true.”

“Why do you do that?” he asked, digging a hand into his hair.

“Do what?”

“Say my name like that?Sebastian. No one calls me Sebastian.”

“Do you want me to call you Baz?” she asked carefully.

“No, I don’t fucking want you to call me—”

“Then I don’t understand what the problem is.”

“I didn’t say it was a problem.”

“If you want me to call you Baz—”

“Just tell me why, Sabrina!”

They stared at each for a long time as the Ferris wheel continued to turn, before she finally gave him an answer that leveled him. “BecauseBazwas engaged to my sister. AndSebastian…is mine.”

---