Page 36 of Unforgivable Ties

I choked on the coffee I was drinking. Yes, I desperately wanted to fuck her. No, I hadn’t thought too far ahead about the repercussions of that.

“It’s not like that,” I said firmly. “She just sleeps in my spare bedroom.”

“For now, maybe,” Ettore said, a hint of amusement laced into his words. “But you know as well as I do how these things usually turn out.”

I said goodbye and tapped the end call button. Fuck. Now everyone was going to know about the peculiar arrangement I had with Stephanie.

Well...this wouldn’t be all bad. I opened the contacts on my phone and scrolled to M. My finger hovered overMom.It was always such a struggle to tell her anything about my life, because it centered on the mafia.

And I knew she was disappointed in me for it. My mom had married my dad knowing full well he was in the mafia. At first,she could see past it, because she was so in love. But a few years and two kids in the rose-colored glasses fell off.

When I was sixteen, my dad died. My mother had expected me to leave that lifestyle behind, but I was already too far in. I had been raised on codes and blood feuds, on respect and hierarchy. To abandon all that was not just impossible, it was unthinkable. So I carried on the family tradition, much to my mother’s disapproval.

I took a deep breath and tapped her name. As the phone rang, I secretly hoped it would go to voicemail so I wouldn’t have to talk to her. But on the fourth ring, she picked up.

“Vincenzo,” she said, sounding somewhat surprised.

“Hey, mom.”

“Is everything alright?” Her voice was filled with worry.

She wouldn’t expect me to call her unless there was a problem. Unlike her and my sister, she and I weren’t close.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I was just calling to see how you were.”

“Oh, well that’s a surprise,” she said, the surprise now replaced with suspicion in her voice. “I’m fine as well. Your sister visited yesterday with Graham. He’s almost two—I wish you would find the time to meet him.”

I wanted to, I really did. But part of me felt like I would contaminate him, pass on some mafia gene. Another part knew it was just an excuse to avoid facing my mother, my sister, and the normal life they exemplified.

“Yeah,” I said. “Maybe my girlfriend and I could come?”

“Girlfriend?” She echoed the word, an obvious note of surprise now crystal clear in her tone. Then, after a moment’s pause, she added, “Well, that’s news.”

It was a lie. But I felt like I couldn’t face my family unless I had something going for me other than being a mobster. They lived normal, happy lives. I killed people and shattered others’ happy lives.

“Is she...?” my mom trailed off, but I knew what she was trying to ask. She wanted to know if Stephanie was in the mafia.

“She’s a med student,” I said. “From Wisconsin. Her name is Stephanie.”

“Well, that’s...unexpected,” my mom said. She sounded a bit relieved. “Does she know about...you know, your life?”

“Yeah.”

“Stephanie. That’s a pretty name.” Her voice had warmed considerably and I could almost see her smiling at the idea of me dating a medical student, no doubt forgetting momentarily about the bloodshed that colored my existence.

She was probably having visions of me settling down and finding a way out of this lifestyle. But that would never work, just like it never worked for her and my father.

“I’ll see when Alessandra is available and let you know.”

The elevator doors dinged, and Stephanie walked through, lugging her backpack and schoolbooks with her. Her hair was sticking out in different directions from a long day at school and her sunglasses were askew on her head.

Even after a long day at school, she looked cute in her slightly disarrayed condition. There was a rawness about her, an innocence that was worlds apart from the life I had chosen.

“Sounds good. I’ll talk to you later,” I responded.

“Alright,” my mom hesitated. “I love you, Vincenzo.”

My throat tightened. I wanted to say it; I knew I should say it to her. Instead, I pressed the end call button.