Page 87 of Filthy Devil

Vanished into thin goddamn air.

JAMES

I did not thinkthis plan through. Just like I didn’t the last time I went on the run. At least last time, I had a destination in mind. Even if it was the absolute wrong one.

Now I have nothing.

My feet move quickly, one after the other, as I try to stay in the dark shadows of the buildings around me so that I’m not seen.

I can’t go back to Pineville. I have nowhere to go. But what I do know is that I’m not a commodity. The Southern Mafiais obviously not going to let this go, and I’m not going to let anything else happen to Nash because of me.

What I should have done is left a long time ago. Before the stabbing, I should have walked away, but I definitely should have gone right afterward. I didn’t. Instead, I fell in love with him and stupidly thought that love would be enough to keep him safe.

It’s not, and I’m not going to allow anything to happen to his family. I know I’m doing everything I promised him I wouldn’t do by walking away, but I also know that he would not only kill but also die to keep me safe. And I refuse to allow him to die for me. Even if he thinks I am, I know that I am, without a doubt, not worth it.

So, I’ll be walking away from the life that I never knew I wanted. A life of love and happiness, a life with a man who treats me like I’m special. Who looks at me as if he can’t believe that I’m his. A life with a man who wants to give me a houseful of babies.

I hate myself right now.

My past self hates me, but not as much as my future self is going to. Because I know without a doubt that my future self is going to be miserable as hell. Completely fucking miserable.

My high heels click on the concrete sidewalk with each step I take. I’m not sure how long I walk, but I have no idea where I am. And when I stop to look around and take in my surroundings, I realize there’s no sense in doing that because I don’t know where anything is here.

I’m lost.

Not that I’ve had any idea of where I’m headed, but I have zero clue where I am, and it’s late at night. The warm ocean air washes over me, sending a chill down my spine. Wrapping my arms around my waist, I inhale a deep breath, let it outslowly, then try to muster up every ounce of my bravery… which honestly isn’t much.

My feet move, one after the other, as I force them to continue down the street. I’m not sure how long I’ve been walking, but I’m forced to stop when my feet start hurting so badly that I have to take my shoes off and check to see if they’re bleeding. They aren’t.

Carrying both of my shoes in one hand, I continue. That is until a dark car pulls up next to me. The car stops, and my heart beats so loudly in my chest that I wonder if it can be heard by the man on the other side of the tinted window beside me.

Oh my god.

Whoever is on the other side of that tinted window probably thinks I’m a hooker or something. With a cringe, I look down at my clothes, my short dress and bare legs. I look like a hooker, too. If I saw me walking down the street, I would think the same thing.

The window slowly begins to roll down. My heart slams harder and harder against my ribs. It’s a wonder that it hasn’t burst through my chest yet and landed on the ground in front of my bare feet.

“James Bishop,” a deep voice murmurs.

My gaze lifts from my feet and meets the man on the other side of the window. It’s the suit from dinner, Gil. His face is expressionless, but I can tell he’s wondering what the fuck is going on by looking into his eyes.

“Gil,” I whisper.

“Nashville is likely losing his mind right about now. What are you doing out here?”

I think about lying to him. I almost tell him to mind his own business and go away, but there is something keeping me from doing that. Call it my own stupidity, I’m not sure, but I don’t turntail and run. I don’t tell him to fuck off. Instead, I shrug a single shoulder.

“Get in the car. You cannot be walking around here this time of night.”

Looking over my shoulder, I shift my attention back to meet his. I’m not sure how to respond to that. I open my mouth to tell him no when I hear several men’s voices from somewhere in the distance.

They whistle, and then I hear some obscenities. My spine straightens, and Gil chuckles. “Girl, you better get the fuck in the car because if I drive away, that group of four guys is gonna have their way with you.”

“But you won’t?” I whisper.

He shakes his head and holds up his hands, his palms facing me in a surrender pose. “Got a deal I’m working on with your old man. I’m not going to fuck that over… at least not yet.”

“How about never?” I ask. “Never fuck them over.”

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