Page 80 of The Temporary Roomie: Extended Edition

“You tell me right now . . . wait, Jane? Are you serious? Your full name is Jessica Jane? What was your mom thinking? It’s like the female version of Jesse James.”

I shrug. It’s always stumped me too.

She shakes her head, resurfacing from her mental detour. “Jessie, are you having contractions?”

I squint one eye and make a thinking face. “No. I’m fine. Let’s start the movie.”

Lucy shakes her head with anuh-uhsound and goes to grab her phone. “No. Nope. I’m not falling for it. I’ve seen these movies and the best friend gets trickedevery single time.I’m calling Drew.”

A humorless laugh falls out of my mouth. “Go ahead! But I’ve been trying for the last four hours, and I haven’t been able to get ahold of him since the pain started.”

Phone in hand and pressed to her ear, Lucy slowly turns to face me. Her voice is dangerous when she speaks. “Are you telling me you’ve been in labor for the last four hours and you didn’t tell me?!”

“I didn’t want to worry you if it was just a false alarm. They were super irregular at first . . .”

“AND NOW THEY’RE NOT?!”

“SHHHHHH. You’re going to wake up Levi!” And any astronauts currently on the moon.

“Tell me, Jessie.”

I sigh deeply, knowing the second I tell her the number, Lucy is going to bolt from the room for my go bag. She knows exactly where it is because she’s been adding little things to it all night. At first it was a cute overnight bag I got off Etsy. It had a pair of PJs, an outfit for the baby, and a toothbrush. Now, after Lucy has gotten her motherly paws on it, it’s stuffed so full of random baby crap that she upgraded my bag to a full-on suitcase. I’m going to have to wheel it into the hospital like I’m headed to summer camp because it’s so damn heavy.

“They’re coming every five minutes now.”

Lucy’s eyes double in size and then, yep, she’s gone. Her feet thunder down the hall and then she comes back with my go bag(go suitcase) clutched in her hand, a pillow stuffed under her other arm, keys in hand. She zooms up beside me and starts trying to hoist me up off the floor, but I don’t budge an inch.

“Ugh.Come on, Jessie!!We. Need. To. Go.” She’s really using all her strength to try to lift me by the armpits. Poor thing can’t move me. “Geez, woman. Have you been eating nothing but marshmallows and chocolate for every meal?”

I shoot her daggers. No, vipers. “Real nice, making fun of the pregnant woman’s weight while she’s in labor!”

She softens and pets my hair. “I’m sorry. I love you, you beautiful goddess.”

“Better,” I say, folding my arms. “Besides, you forgot your son! Were you just going to drive off without him?”

She gawks likeOMG I would never!“No. I was just going to . . . get you in the car first andthengo get him.”

“Mm-hmm. Well, it doesn’t matter because I’m not leaving.”

“You’re not?”

“I’m not.”

Lucy sighs dramatically and sinks down to sit, throwing her hand over her eyes like she’s swooning on a nineteenth-century fainting couch. “You’re going to be as difficult as possible tonight, aren’t you?”

“I resent that.”

I’m not being difficult. I’m just not going to the hospital without Drew. The plan was, I would go into labor and Drew would carry my bags to the car, and then together we would head for the hospital, where he would hold my hand for the entirety of my birthing experience. Drew not answering his cellphone and being four hours away wasnota part of the plan. It wasn’t. So I’m sticking to the plan.

“Drew will be back tomorrow afternoon. I’ll wait until then to have the baby.” I’m staring at the blank TV like a Zen master.

Lucy cracks up at this. “You’llwait?! Oh my gosh, you’re looney! You’ve completely lost it!”

I narrow my eyes at her. “I don’t like you too much tonight.”

Lucy slides down on the floor beside me and takes my hand just as another contraction hits me. It’s so strong and painful I can’t believe this isn’t even the worst of it. How am I going to do this?Oh, Jesus, take the wheel!

Once I’ve thoroughly crushed Lucy’s hand, she gives me sympathetic eyes that make me start crying. She says, “You can’t wait, Jessie. I swear this baby will come out with or without your approval. Now come on, we gotta get you to the hospital. I’ll keep trying Drew and Cooper on the way.”

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