Page 53 of Prohibited

Ryan glanced down at his fingers, a strange blaze of surprise and embarrassment passing through him. He wasn’t that drunk. He looked past his knee to the floor, where Alex shifted his oxford away from the crushed cigarette. The faint smell of singed wool hit his nose.

Well, fuck.

That didn’t discourage him from pulling another cigarette from the pack in his shirt pocket and putting it between his lips. Alex was ready with a light before he had a chance to reach for his book of matches.

He looked at him out of the corner of his eye, shoulders tensing.

A strange mix of feelings was churning in his gut. With a little whisky–okay, a lot of whisky–poured on top, and a heap of spite, it felt like the ominous approach of a tempest. It was a feeling he didn’t care to analyze–hadn’t cared to analyze, really. Ever since they shared that one night together, Alex had stayed lurking in the back of his mind. The possibility was always there but muted, in the background. Something he could ignore.

Since Tommy had died–the very thought made his heart squeeze–and they’d been spending so much time together, something had shifted. Alex touched him more. He didn’t suppress the snapping fire in his blue eyes when he looked at Ryan anymore. He was always close, always watching.

Ryan couldn’t shake the knowledge that in the bathroom when Alex touched Evelyn with so much wanton abandon, he’d done it for Ryan’s sake as much as his own. The thought made his insides move around and rearrange themselves in a strange, crawling dance.

Part of him hated it. Was fucking repulsed by the very idea. It wasn’t that Alex was a man. God knew there had been others for Ryan. But it was Alex. And it wasn’t because Alex was family because he wasn’t.

It’s because it was Alex.

He tried to prevent himself from thinking of the other side of the coin, but he couldn’t. It came at him with a shiver: part of him liked it. He liked the insane, obsessive desire Alex had for him. They had never, ever spoken of it, but it was impossible to be the object of such a desire for years without being aware of it. And something about the reptilian ferocity that Alex possessed sent prickles over his skin. His physical beauty was undeniable. The face of an archangel. Hair so pale it was almost white. Beautiful hands. Just a little broad through the shoulders and a neat waist. And his cock was thick and beautiful, certainly nothing to complain about.

These things at war inside of him were like the strangest current of electricity. Pleasure and abject discomfort pulsing through him all at once. It was something best ignored. And usually a lot more readily ignored.

But Alex was standing close now, watching him with hooded eyes, dark lashes close to his cheeks. One corner of his pink lips was raised in a sardonic smile and his fingers were interlaced, causing his body to create a diagonal against the boxes stacked next to him.

“What do you want?” Ryan asked at last, shifting with the fraught discomfort pulsing through him.

“The pleasure of your company,” Alex said in a smooth, sultry voice. “It’s late and I’m lonely.”

“Ha,” Ryan said softly and took a drag on his cigarette. “You’re not capable of feeling lonely.” His eyes lingered on Alex’s lips until he realized what he was doing. He swallowed hard and looked away. God, he hoped Alex didn’t notice.

But of course he did. Alex noticed everything.

“You want to fuck her,” Alex said in a low voice. The voice of a lover. It fell on the back of Ryan’s neck like a caress.

He swallowed hard and closed his eyes for a moment, shame and embarrassment churning through him. But a hint of something. Something that felt dreadfully like pleasure.

“So?” he said. Was it just him, or did his voice sound unsteady?

God, he really should have stopped drinking hours ago.

“So why don’t you?” Alex asked, his voice a purr.

Ryan closed his eyes and steeled himself against the lust and the anger that went forking through him like the Devil’s lightning.

“What the fuck do you want, Alex?” Ryan said it again, but this time with more agitation. He was hard as a rock now, between his thoughts of Evelyn and whatever this fucking perverse conversation was developing into. He fucking hated himself for it, but desire was beating steadily through him like a low bass note.

He should shove Alex away, put some distance between them. But instead he just sat there, staring into those eyes that were dark and glittering with unbridled delight.

Fucking evil.

“I want you,” Alex said. His voice a soft wisp of smoke in the air. There was nothing desperate or cajoling about it. Nothing demanding or coercive. It was a simple fact.

Though he was the one to ask the question, Ryan had not for one moment actually been prepared to be met with a frank answer. Alex could be incredibly evasive. But other times, he could smack you in the face with truth like a hammer.

Now was one of those times.

“Want me,” Ryan repeated without a breath in his body. Gibberish because he didn’t know what to do or say. A heady, incredible feeling was coming through him. A spell of delicious, sexual hunger not unlike what he felt for Evelyn.

“Well,” Alex said, straightening up slowly. “Not all of you. Your body, really, is what I want. The rest, you dowith as you please.” He moved slowly toward Ryan, like a man trying hard not to startle an angry stallion. He stepped between Ryan’s thighs and put a hand on each one, sending incredible shocks through Ryan’s flesh that went straight through his cock.