Page 52 of Christmas With My Ex

For a second, Nicholas doesn’t move. His face goes pale, and I can almost hear his breath catch in his throat. He looks away, blinking rapidly like he’s trying to process something huge.

“Nicholas?” I lean forward, concern swelling in my chest. “Tell me what is going on in your head.”

He turns back to me, his voice low and shaky. “That’s Sammy’s birthday, Rives.”

I stare at him, my heart suddenly pounding in my ears. “What does that mean?” I don't know why I'm being so obtuse, but my brain can't let me go there.

“October 15th, 2019,” he repeats, his voice tight. “That’s the day Sammy was born.”

I freeze, my mind trying to grasp the weight of what he’s saying. No. No, it can’t be. But the look in Nicholas’ eyes tells me he’s serious. Dead serious.

My heart starts to race, every fiber of my being rejecting what he’s suggesting. “Nicholas, no... that’s impossible. It can’t be.”

"Did you put my name as the father?"

Ashamed, I admit that I didn't. "No, I said the father was unknown."

"That's how it happened. They didn't know Helena and Bobby were related to the baby. As far as the agency knew, they placed a baby with a family, no one had any idea there was a connection. It makes perfect sense."

He pulls out his phone, scrolling through pictures again.

“Look at him, Rives,” he says quietly. “The brown hair... it’s just like yours. Those natural highlights. And the blue eyes, they’re exactly the same.”

I swallow hard, feeling my throat tighten as I look at the picture for the tenth time. I want to say he’s wrong. I want to dismiss it. But I can’t. Not when I’m staring at the evidence right in front of me.

It’s undeniable.

Sammy looks like me. And he looks like Nicholas.

I close my eyes, trying to push away the thoughts, but it’s too late. They flood in, overwhelming me. What if Nicholas is right? What if the child I gave up, the baby I thought I’d never see again, is right here?

The tears burn behind my eyes, and I don’t have the strength to hold them back. My throat closes up, and I can’t bring myself to look at Nicholas. Because if I do, I know I’ll break.

“Oh my God,” I whisper, my voice cracking. “Nicholas... could he really be... ours?”

He doesn’t answer right away. He looks down at the picture again, his expression hard to read. “I don’t know,” he admits quietly. “But the resemblance... it’s too strong to ignore.”

I shake my head, my mind spinning in a thousand different directions. I never imagined this. I never thought I’d be standing here, wondering if the little boy I spent the day with is the son I gave up. It’s too much to process. Too much to handle.

“He... he acts like you,” Nicholas says, breaking the silence again. “That same adventurous spirit. Always curious, always pushing limits. I’ve seen it in him for years, but now... it makes sense.”

Tears stream down my face as I look at Nicholas. I don’t have words. I can’t speak. The weight of this revelation is crashing down on me, and I feel like I’m drowning in it.

“What do we do?” I manage to whisper, my voice barely audible.

Nicholas shakes his head, his own face clouded with uncertainty. “I don’t know,” he says, his voice thick. “I don’t know what we’re supposed to do.”

We sit there in silence, both of us trying to process this bombshell that’s just dropped into our lives. Sammy. My son. Our son. Helena's son.

My heart breaks, shattering into pieces as I realize what this could mean.

Epilogue

NICHOLAS

Christmas / Let your heart be light. Next year all our troubles will be out of sight

Tuesday, December 24, 2024

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