Page 45 of Hidden Heart

He was there. Outside her apartment, he was there. She took a ragged breath. Of course, he was there. The thought of losing was unacceptable. He chased her to prove he could conquer her—not love her. Well, he could shove off. She marched to the door while tucking her hair behind her ear and straightening her T-shirt.

“How do you keep getting in?” she blurted when she flung open the door. The breath whooshed from her lungs at the sight of him. His usually styled hair splayed over his forehead, his disheveled suit clung to his body in the well-mannered way it always had, but the knot in his tie looked lopsided, and he’d missed the top button of his shirt as well. But none of that affected her the way his eyes looked at her.

Wild blue eyes stared at her. Her breath hitched. “Someone left, and I grabbed the door,” he explained, not attempting to enter her apartment. His fingers itched to grab her, but instead he shoved his hands into the pockets of his trousers. “We need to talk.”

“I think—”

“No, you aren’t thinking. You’re reacting to the wrong information, instead of thinking.” His eyes washed over her then to the floor, where her shoes remained lined up against the wall on her mat. She hadn’t had the heart to remove it, not yet. She tried to cover it by stepping to the side, but she could see the sight had given him more resolve—strengthening him. “We need to finish our conversation.” She could tell him no, lock herself away from him and eventually he would concede. He wouldn’t force her. But she didn’t want that. If they were over, she wanted it ended, no lingering doubts.

“Fine. Have it your way.” She turned her back on him and walked into her apartment, reminding herself to keep calm and stick to her decision. Nothing he said would change her mind.

The door shut behind her, and she turned back to him. He pointed at the mat on the floor. “Why do you have this here?” His soft voice contrasted with the intensity of his body language.

“Because I want it.” She wouldn’t explore that, not with him at that moment. It would be too humiliating, make her vulnerable again—andthatwas not happening.

“That’s one.” He held up his finger. “Actually, it’s three if I count from the last time we spoke, but I’ll be generous.” His jaw clenched. “We’ll talk about the mat later. Now, tell me what Melody said to you when you came to my apartment.”

She eyed him carefully. He wasn’t begging for forgiveness or for her to take him back. “It doesn’t matter, Royce. Look, I know you don’t like not getting what you want but—”

“Is that what you think?” His eyes narrowed. “You think I’ve been worrying about you all week because I didn’t get to have my way?” His voice held a challenge. “You think I’ve been so torn apart at the idea of losing you because I see you as some prize? A possession I don’t want to lose?” He still stood a few feet from her, he might as well have been breathing on top of her. He seemed to fill the entire room.

A day or two ago, she may have answered that he did see her as a possession. But he stood in front of her, hair mussed, eyes dark, and flushed cheeks, and she knew. It was her he wanted, not just anyone, but her. She hadn’t taken the day off to mourn a loss—but a loss of him and his love. She mourned losing him. She loved him. Love—the one thing she didn’t want and had convinced herself she didn’t need. She couldn’t breathe without it, without his love. She needed his hands, his eyes, his words, his heart. She wanted him—all of him.

He didn’t leave work and hightail it to her apartment just to win some conquest. He stood there for her.

She gripped the wine bottle with both hands. “She said you were out getting dinner,” she answered honestly, squaring her shoulders.

He studied her for a long moment, and she worried he’d changed his mind. That he didn’t care about that anymore, that he would turn and leave her again.

“And?” He waved his hand in a circular motion as though to pull the information from her.

“That you’d be home soon, and she needed to get the table ready.” She lowered her voice unintentionally. Hearing Melody call him Sir had severed her heart. She’d replayed it in her mind until her body shook with heavy, breath-stealing sobs.

He slid his coat off his broad shoulders and tossed it to the couch.

“Tell me what she said…exactly.” Royce stepped toward her, unbuttoning his sleeve.

She tried to fight off the raging emotion rising in her, but it was too strong.

“She said, ‘Sir will be back any moment, and I have to prepare the table,’” she recited out loud as she had so many times in her mind over the past week.

Royce winced. “When she called me Sir—which I told her to stop doing—how did that feel?” He rolled up his sleeve.

“Royce—”

“Answer me,” he snapped. He didn’t shout, but his voice was firmer than she’d ever heard. The tables had turned somewhere from the point he entered her apartment. She was no longer the predator in the room.

She took a deep breath. “I hated it.” She put the bottle on the coffee table and sat on the couch. “I hatedher.”

“Melody is part of my past. She understands that now. You are my present and my future.” He softened his voice and unbuttoned his other sleeve. “I should have told you about her. For that omission, I’m sorry. She’s been sending gifts weekly, and I should have known she wouldn’t just go away.” He stopped his movements to look her in the eye as he gave his apology. “I won’t lie. She tried her damnedest to get me back in her life. I have no interest in her or anything else she offers. She isn’t you.” He rolled up the second sleeve.

Tears pooled in Jessica’s eyes as he explained. She should have known, should have given him a chance to tell her all these things before shutting him out.

“You didn’t tell me she sent you gifts.” Her accusation lacked any heat.

“No, I didn’t tell you. I suppose I should have. They started arriving before I met you, and, since we started seeing each other, I moved my focus to my future with you rather than getting rid of my past. But I should have told you. I’m sorry. Melody showing up like that wouldn’t have been such a shock if I had told you what she was up to.”

Jessica nodded. Melody really was his past. Had he really been looking at their future?

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