Page 26 of Hidden Heart

“I can wait.” His voice remained steady.

Their wills warred against each other.

Her mind raced. She braced herself and forced her voice into action. “Okay. I’m ready.”

The belt crashed across both cheeks at the curve—too close to her thighs to count as a slap on the ass. She cried out and shook with tension then slowly allowed herself to relax.

More tears spilled onto her cheeks, and she realized the whimpering filling the room came from her. A release valve had been triggered with the last lick of the belt. The tears wouldn’t be fought against; her emotions bubbled over until they couldn’t be suppressed any longer. Resting her face on the bed, she pulled her legs up and curled into a ball.

He sat beside her and rested his hand on her back. He said nothing, but he remained. She lay on his bed blubbering like an idiot. Shouldn’t he be running from the room?

After a few moments of quietly shedding tears, she unraveled herself and sat up. Concerned eyes met hers and she leaned into him, resting her face in the crook of his neck “I’m sorry.” She sniffled.

He wrapped his arms around her, tucking her beneath his chin. “Me too. I really wanted to ravage you this morning.” His words only twisted her stomach further.

She’d ruined what could have been a wonderfully sexy morning.

“Another time.” He kissed the top of her head and rubbed his chin against her.

“Do you still want me to answer your question?” Her voice was soft.

“Yes. Would you like to get dressed first?” He stroked her bare shoulder.

“No, it’s okay.” Being naked made being vulnerable to him somewhat easier. If she could handle this, him being able to see and touch her everywhere, letting him see what was beneath wouldn’t be so hard. So long as she didn’t have to look at him at the same time.

He kissed her again and tightened his hold. “Are you ashamed of what we did—or that you enjoyed it?” She suddenly understood what witnesses at trial must feel like.

“I don’t understand why I enjoyed it. I guess that’s the scary part. Not understanding your own feelings. I mean, the clamps hurt…but in a good way. Which makes no sense. The crop…same thing. It’s all messed up. Maybe I’m messed up.” She shrugged and wiped the tears from her cheek.

He nudged her away with his shoulder and used his finger to raise her chin. His eyes deepened with sincerity. “You are not messed up.” His voice was firm. “I want you to do me a favor. I want you to open yourself to the possibility that you can find happiness in a relationship with another person.”

“You are asking for a lot.” She tried to pull away, but he held her tightly with his fingers.

“I know.” He kissed her nose. “Just allow yourself to feel without doubt or scrutiny.”

“You are a terrifying man.” She screwed up her lips into a half smile.

“Really?” Sarcasm seeped from his response.

“Yes.” She pouted. He gave in to her request and placed his lips on hers.

“No more hiding from me. I won’t give you a second chance again. The first time you hide, you’ll be punished.” He released her. “I’ll let you get dressed. I’d like to walk you home. I have a project for you, and it will take you most of the day to complete it.” He flashed a mischievous smile at her and pinched her bottom to get her moving.

She giggled—a sound she had not made in a long time—and scooted from the bed. “I thought we agreed you wouldn’t invade my private bubble.” She shot him a worried glance as she worked her pants over her hips.

“I’m going to nudge that boundary a little.” He found a clean shirt and pulled it over his head. “Don’t worry,” he stepped to her and gathered her in his arms, kissing her wrinkled brow, “I know you’ve had bad experiences with trust in the past, but you’re going to start learning to trust me.” He kissed her nose once more.

She took a deep breath. “Okay.”

He kissed her mouth. “Good girl.” He smiled against her lips and released her. “Now, let’s get you home.”

A warm shiver ran through her with the words “good girl.” Two words striking a happy place in her core. She pushed her worry down for later evaluation and followed him from the room.

Chapter 8

The walk to Jessica’s apartment gave Royce time to contemplate the new relationship. New relationships didn’t scare him; he’d had plenty over the past several years. They were all fun at first then sagged a bit in the middle before dying a slow, pitiful death at the end. Jessica threatened to be different.

It wasn’t the thrill of training her to be his submissive or the excitement of new love that kept him wanting her. It was the way warmth would spread through his veins at the sight of her, the smell of her, the sound of her voice. Even her “hello” on the phone made his heart race. These feelings put him in new territory.

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