Page 106 of High Frequency

“It never ceases to amaze me, the messed-up shit people do to each other,” he adds. “The dark crap we carry around inside, hidden from those around us. It’s ugly.”

I’m not sure at this point if we’re still talking about what happened here or whether he is referring to something I’m not privy to. But when I shoot him an inquiring look, he shakes his head. It’s my warning not to pursue, which I honor.

Instead, I steer the conversation to construction progress.

“How much longer do you figure before we can start putting up some drywall and insulation?”

“Plumbing is done for now, HVAC will be by the end of this week, and the electrician said he’ll need another five or six days to finalize the rough-ins. We should be able to follow behind room by room. In a hurry?” he asks.

I tell him about the plans for Thanksgiving.

“Lucky bastard. You go from a bachelor’s existence with no family to a fucking instant houseful, including a woman and a baby.”

I bend my head, grinning, as I pluck at the label on my beer bottle.

“Yeah, well…trust me, I never thought I’d be that guy.”

“You did once,” he reminds me.

“I know, and then I gave up on that dream.”

Jackson shakes his head. “Like I said, lucky bastard.”

We sit in silence as the sinking sun turns the sky a deep orange. A light rustle to the left draws my attention and I see the beautiful bull elk make an appearance. I can’t really be sure it’s the same one I’ve seen before or not, but I’d like to think it is.

“Look,” I alert Jackson on a whisper.

“I’ve seen him before, this time of night,” Jackson shares. “He likes to snack on that patch of grass along the riverbank.”

Sure enough, he bends his neck, lowering his large rack of antlers as he starts munching away. We watch for a while, until all of a sudden his head comes up, ears alert. He must’ve heard something, because the next moment he is gone again.

“I’d forgotten how beautiful it is here.”

I turn to Jackson, who is leaning forward, looking out at the darkening mountain range.

“Even living here, I forget sometimes,” I admit, before cautiously adding, “Have you thought about staying here permanently?”

“Mom wants me to, and Jonas offered me a spot on the team.” He snorts derisively. “Not sure what he thinks I can contribute.”

It’s on my lips to remind him there is plenty, but I hold back, because I realize it’s not so much about what others value in him, but in how he values himself.

Instead, I challenge him.

“Only one way to find out.”

“You’re an asshole,” he mumbles, throwing me a dirty look.

“Water off my back, my friend,” I tell him as I get to my feet.

I gather up the empties and drop them in the case we left just inside the house. Jackson follows me down the porch steps to my truck.

“Maybe on the weekend we can sneak off for a short ride,” he suggests when I get behind the wheel.

As far as I know, he hasn’t yet been back in the saddle, so this feels like a huge step. I hold back on the fist pump though, I’m sure he doesn’t want to turn this into a big deal.

“Sure. You can take Will. I’ll grab Blitz, he’s due for some exercise.”

He nods and lifts his hand as he walks over to the motorhome.

---