I never stopped loving her. But was the person I loved ever real? Just thinking about what she did makes my blood boil.
I hate her for breaking us apart. I hate her for choosing anything else over our love. I thought we were unstoppable together. I thought we were forever.
I put my coffee mug down a little too hard, the built-upfrustration showing through. It clangs against the marble countertop.
Fuck her for coming back now —during the hardest time of the year. This is when Bella and I struggle with the grief of losing her mother. Now, on top of that, I have to relive the pain of losing Vera and our baby.
Before I even realize what I'm doing, I'm storming towards Vera's cell. I have to know what she was thinking. I have to confront her.
I can't just leave this alone. It will eat me alive all holiday.
I shove the wooden doors open and I'm surprised to see Vera standing by the window, wrapped in a blanket. She quickly turns to face me; her bright green eyes are wide with fright.
"Massimo. You came back." She says, the warmth of her breath turning to steam in the cold air.
"Why did you betray me? I thought you loved me. I honestly believed it."
"I did love you - I do - I still do - " She stammers, tripping over her lies.
"No, if you loved me, if you felt anything at all for me - you would never have chosen anything but me. What was in it for you? Money? Status? Power?"
"Massimo please, we need to talk about Elio."
"What the fuck?"
Elio? I am asking her about how she ripped my world apart and she wants to talk about my cousin?
"I think he was behind the conspiracy."
Anger surges through me. She will do anything to avoid accepting responsibility for what she did. I take three long strides toward her, my hand wrapping around her throat as I slam her back against the wall. She cries out, and her fear ignites something dark inside me. It burns through my veins, fueling me, making me grip her tighter.
"You should be begging for my forgiveness, not trying to place the blame on someone else." I snarl, my face inches from hers. I can feel the heat of her breath on my lips.
"Massimo, I am telling you the truth. I would never have done that to you. Stop being so blinded by what everyone else tells you and just listen for a second."
Her voice is constricted by my grip, but she is angry, and confrontational - or is she just defensive.
My fingers tighten a little more around her throat, blocking off her words. Stopping her lies. I can't take it.
Her eyes grow wide with fear, but I can still see the anger mixed in there.
She shoves me hard, trying to push me away. Then starts kicking at me, wildly fighting me off.
But all it does is make me more aggressive towards her.
She claws at my arm with her nails, and I grab her wrists, pinning them behind her back.
No matter how much I want to hate her - I can't look at her without seeing the woman I loved.
What if she's right?
What if my son is still alive?
What if she never betrayed me?
No.
She's just getting beneath my skin. She manipulated me into loving her once.