Diana: You’re braving the roads?
Cordelia: *GIF of Legolas popping his head from a snow pile.*
Diana: lol, okay! Enough. You’re such a child. I don’t have time for this.
Cordelia: *GIF of Dwight Schrute saying, “That’s true.”*
Diana: If I’m deciphering this correctly, you’re coming for lunch?
Cordelia: *GIF of Donald Trump speaking into a microphone: “CORRECT”*
Diana: I’m turning off my phone in 10 seconds. I need to get my crew out the door for church. And Mom says to please return her calls.
Cordelia: Won’t make it in time for church today. The snow plow made a pass on the gravel road and built a wall of ice blocking our driveway. Mr. Landlord is shoveling.
Diana: You don’t feel compelled to help him?
Cordelia: Have you SEEN the muscles on this machine? He could lift two of me on one shovel. Me helping would be like Lisa helping you cook.
Diana: Better view from the window?
Cordelia: That’s not what I said.
Diana: So how’s the view from the window?
Cordelia: Ope, sorry. GTG. Water’s boiling. Toast is hot, um, the CAT NEEDS FED! BYEE
* * *
Bing!
Mark: FYI, my flight’s on the 22nd at 7pm. Are you picking me up or do I order a ride?
Cordelia: No need for random car orders. We don’t believe in them over here.
Mark: I’ve already looked it up. I can have one reserved.
Cordelia: What?! There’s no way I’ll let you pay that to get here. I’ll pick you up.
Mark: You need to leave Hadley Springs by 5:30.
Cordelia: I can do math.
Mark: I don’t want to be stranded at the airport again.
Cordelia: That was ONE TIME.
Mark: Put it in your calendar and I’ll promise not to order a car.
Cordelia: *Screenshot of New Event in my calendar: “Pick up annoying cousin.” December 22, 5:30 p.m.*
Mark: And set a reminder at least one hour before.
Cordelia: Done.
Mark: Good.
Mark: And be sure to get gas first.