Page 45 of Insatiable

It wasn’t the reaction I expected.

“Why the fuck not? Last night was fucking amazing. You are fucking amazing and you’re carrying my child. Why wouldn’t I stay?”

She gapes at me as though I’ve said something stupid. Until I met Ro, I was always cocksure about everything I said, but now I fumble over everything I say.

“Two weeks ago, you couldn’t stand the sight of me. Two weeks ago, you called me a bitch. Two weeks ago, you’d gladly have seen me dead and would probably have danced on my grave, Barclay.”

Her words cut through me like a knife. Her voice isn’t even raised, but I can see a hint of panic as though she’s trying to hide her emotions as she pulls her dress over her head. The worst thing is, every word she’s saying is true. Two weeks ago, I wouldhave pushed her under a bus if it meant securing my place in the games.

“This isn’t two weeks ago. This is now, and I’m willing to stay here in Gluttony for you and for our child.”

She shakes her head sadly, no longer hiding her emotions. “Two weeks might be enough to forget everything you said and did to me, but it’s not enough for me. The sex I had with you made me feel things I didn’t think possible and I’m sure you think you’ve changed, but it’s not enough. It’s nowhere close to being enough. Go and do the third trial and get through to the next circle.”

Without a glance back, she walks across the room to the other door, not the one barricaded by the dresser. She opens it and steps through, her back still to me.

“Goodbye, Barclay.”

And just like that, she’s gone, taking my heart and my sanity with her.

21

THE THIRD TRIAL

ROWENA

I’m not crying. I refuse to shed tears for a man who bullied me, just like everyone else who has torn me down over the years. And I definitely won’t cry over something that had the potential to be real.

Having a man stand up for me—that’s never been my reality. The idea of someone sacrificing anything for me is so foreign; I don’t even know how to process it. For a fleeting moment, I saw forever in his eyes. I glimpsed a future I’ve only ever dared to dream of. But dreams like that don’t belong to me. They’re not for people like me.

If Felix stays here, trapped with me in this place of emptiness—no food, no distractions, nothing of value—he’ll start to resent me. It’s inevitable, and it will happen sooner rather than later. I know he thinks he wants this, thinks he’s made some grand decision overnight, but I’ve spent a lifetime imagining my perfect future. And none of those dreams ever involved being stuck in a one-bedroom corner of Hell with a man who, just two weeks ago, admitted he hated me.

The man slept with Quinn’s under age sister, making her kill herself. What other dark secrets lie in his past that I don’tknow about? Getting involved with Felix Barclay was a stupid mistake and though he might have changed, the things he has hidden in his past are unforgivable. I mentally berate myself for going back to him It was a moment of weakness that won’t be repeated. Next week, he’ll have moved on, and I’ll pretend he never existed, like a fleeting shadow I can erase. I’m halfway down the third set of stairs when something stops me cold. A flutter. I freeze, my hand instinctively going to my stomach. Did I imagine it? I stand still, waiting for it to happen again. This pregnancy has been speeding by, faster than anything I ever imagined, so is it really too far-fetched to think I might have felt a kick already? Then there it is again. Stronger this time. Definite. A spark of life. Joy floods through me, drowning the misery and the uncertainty. I might never see Felix again after the final trial, but I’ll always have this—a part of him that no one can take from me. The temptation to hide away in my room, nursing the heartbreak, is strong, but this moment—the small but undeniable kicks inside me—is something I can’t keep to myself. It’s a reminder that there’s something bigger than the trials and the pain. Something real. I spot Quinn, Twila, and Juliette sitting at our usual booth. Juliette’s head rests on her hands, not even looking up as I approach. I slide into the booth next to her. "What’s happened now?”

Quinn answers. “Juliette had this grand plan to seduce George, but she somehow ended up in bed with Tomas instead.”

I raise an eyebrow, glad of the distraction. I’ve known Juliette to hook up with some weird people and even the odd demon, but George? “That’s a lot to unpick. Dare I ask why you were trying to seduce George?”

Juliette just groans from under her hair, so Quinn answers for her again.

“She planned to seduce George as a ploy to get everyone back in the games. She’s not quite mentioned how she ended up withTomas instead, but I think I can hazard a guess that it didn’t go well.” She looks down at Jules, who just snorts in response.

“You won’t get back in the games by seducing George.” Twila says, ignoring the very long sigh that seems to be emanating from somewhere under Jules’s hair. “I would have told you that if I’d have known.”

“But you only tell us what we can’t do, not what we can do,” argues Quinn.

“Will you two shut up arguing?” Juliette says, pushing her hair out of her face and sitting up. “Twila. You are right. Seducing George was a terrible idea, not least because the thought makes me want to hurl. I went to see Tomas to have it out with him and then he kissed me and it was like old times. It was perfect and wonderful and awful at the same time.”

“I get that,” I reply before realizing what I’ve just said. Quinn gives me an odd look before turning back to Juliette. “I don’t get it. Was it good or was it awful?”

Juliette shrugs, looking defeated. “Sex with Tomas was always good. Maybe that’s why I stayed through whore after whore. It was familiar. It was nice. It was home.”

“But?”

“But all I could think of was those other women. It turns out that thinking of a line of women standing out the door ready to give him a blow job the second I left kinda put a dampener on it.”

“That would do it,” Quinn quips.

“I don’t know,” Twila chimes in. “Might be fun if those women join you?”

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