Page 44 of Blind Sin

Lucy left me. Okay, maybe she didn’t go far, but she left me with Alexander in the middle of a bustling market. She wouldn’t have done that a week ago. Especially after what happened the last time she left me alone. It feels sad but freeing. “She’s enjoying learning to cook,” I remark, linking my arm into Alexander’s.

“And I'm relishing the chance to have you all to myself,” Alexander whispers seductively into my ear, hinting at more intimate moments to come today. I’ve now had sex with all three men. I slept with Josh because I needed to know how it felt. I wanted to be normal and I’d been in love with him since I was young. I slept with Alexander because I wanted to see and I had sex with Nolan in the sea because I wanted to conquer a fear. I have no reason to have sex with any of these men again if I don’t want to, but as Alexander’s breath warms my ear and his arm skirts round my waist, I find myself pressing into his warm body and imagining that we were a normal couple, doing normal things. I imagine what a future with us could look like. It’s insane. I have no future with Alexander, any more than I have a future with Nolan or Josh, but just for right now, as Alexander leads me through the market of heavenly smells, it all feels so real.

“Come on,” Lucy says about ten minutes later as she threads her arm through my spare arm. “It must have been half an hour. Did you enjoy the market?”

“I did, very much,” I admit and I wonder if she knows that it was more about being with Alexander than the wares that were being sold. “How about you. Did you get anything nice?”

“We picked up some asparagus for dinner. Nolan is going to teach me how to cook it.”

Lucy has done so many things in her life that most people would find extraordinary. She’s traveled the world, been on yachts and private planes and even been nominated for an Oscar, but I don’t think I’ve ever heard her as happy as she is about learning how to cook asparagus. It gives me pause. When this is all over, I need to figure out what I’m going to do with my life. Back at Waldgrave house, it never occurred to me to pick a vocation. It was an absurd thought, but now, especially given where we are going to today, I begin to wonder if there’s something out there that will make me happy too.

30

DACRE

She looks so fucking small and vulnerable in the chair as the doctor inspects her eyes. She's already endured an array of medical procedures today—vaccinations, blood tests, and more. Yet, it's the examination of her eyes that stirs a protective urge in me, a desire to shield her from this ordeal. Remarkably, she hasn't uttered a single complaint, despite facing more medical interventions in a single day than most undergo in years.

As the doctor concludes her examination, she pivots to address us. “Lauren has congenital cataracts,” she announces.

“Cataracts!” Lucinda exclaims, a mix of alarm and hope in her voice. “You can treat those, right? Will she be able to see?”

The doctor exhales slowly. “Typically, early treatment leads to a favorable prognosis. There's often a high success rate in restoring some level of vision, and in many cases, full sight. However...”

That single word 'however' sends a wave of dread through me.

“Since Lauren's condition has remained untreated, the likelihood of her regaining sight diminishes significantly. The operation is unlikely to provide any substantial results, I’m afraid, but it might. The only way to find out is to do the operation.”

I feel a sense of deflation but chide myself for having been too hopeful. “But she saw something!” I interject. “Twice, she saw a flash of light. Doesn't that indicate her eyes are capable of vision?” I'm grasping at straws, and deep down, I know it.

The doctor meets my gaze firmly. “The brain is intricate, and its workings are not always precise. It's possible her eyes perceived something, but it's also plausible that her brain created the illusion of sight. I've never encountered a case quite like this, and I hesitate to give you unfounded hope. My recommendation is to proceed with surgery to remove the cataracts, then assess from there. Lauren, is this something you'd want?”

The question seems almost absurd—who wouldn't want the chance to see? Yet, as I turn to Lauren, I realize she's wrestling with the decision. I restrain myself from speaking on her behalf.

“Yes, please,” she says softly, and beside me, Lucinda exhales a tremulous breath. It's clear I'm not the only one anxious about this.

The doctor turns to her computer as Lucinda rushes over to hug Lauren. “I can schedule her in for the operation for the seventeenth of October.”

The joy in the room fades away. October is months away and there’s not a chance in hell that we’ll still be here by then. “Can I have a word with you outside, Doc?” I say, gesturing to the door.

Mercier casts me a puzzled glance just as the doctor stands, excusing herself into the corridor. I follow, gently closing the door behind us so the others can’t hear what I’m about to say.

“We need her in this week.”

The doctor shakes her head. “I'm afraid that's simply not feasible. This is a small island, our resources are limited. Our hospital only has two operating theaters and they're fully booked.”

Frustration and urgency mix in my voice as I respond. “She needs this operation, and we can't wait until October. We won't even be here then.”

“I can't justify displacing another patient who is equally in need,” the doctor counters.

My voice remains calm, although inside, a storm of desperation is brewing. “I understand the situation, but this is urgent. I'm aware that my family's name played a role in your willingness to see us, and for that, I am grateful. But now, I need to ask for another favor. If you can manage to schedule her operation this week, today even, I'm prepared to make a substantial donation to the hospital.”

The hypocrisy doesn’t escape my notice and I feel like a prize dick as I finger my father’s credit card in my pocket. I've kept this from the others, but the truth is, the doctor is the most costly on the island. The expenses for Lauren's treatments are far greater than what I've admitted to Lucinda. Even if I pooled every bit of cash we possess, it wouldn't come close to covering the costs. The price of the medications and supplements alone exceeds our financial capacity. I pull out the black credit card and show it to her, my father’s name prominent. “My father wants this.”

The doctor gives me a sigh and I’m pretty sure I see a small shake of her head as she pulls out her phone.

I’m just another rich arsehole flaunting my wealth.

“I can get her in next Tuesday, but it’s after hours. The eye surgeon isn’t going to like it.”

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