Page 16 of Be My Sacrifice

“FIGHT, ATASI! DON’T YOU DARE LEAVE ME!” I can hear the sorrowful voice of my ghost lover pleading for me to fight for him, to fight the monster off. But I am too exhausted and weak, frozen in my spot, and just waiting for death to come for me. I only feel the grip of the monster’s claw wrapped around my throat, tightening until not a drop of oxygen makes its way through.

“You will never escape me, girl. You are already lost.”

Chapter eleven

The Liar

Abe

Ireenterthequietroom, the sound of machines beeping rhythmically having an immediate soothing effect on my thundering heart. Every moment that I’m away from my Atasi is akin to torture. A torture I would gladly face, if it meant she would continue to breathe.Please wake up, baby. I need you.

If my body wasn’t still healing, and I didn’t need nourishment to survive, I would never leave her comatose side, spending every minute of the day as her sentinel. I, however, have learned my lesson, when in the first two days as I sat at her bedside, refusing to leave her, I passed the fuck out, which terrified my mother.

“What the hell is the matter with you, Abraham? You need to be strong to stand at her side. You will be no good to her if you are dead. Don’t ever fucking do that again, do you hear me? You just took years off my life.”

The memory of my mom’s tongue lashing, and her surprise cursing, flashes across my mind, and tries its best to pull a smirk from my lips, but it immediately fails. My mouth no longer knows how to smile, and I know with a certainty that until my Atasi wakes from her deep slumber, I’ll never smile again.Come back to me, Atasi. I need you.

A gray-haired woman moves away from the bed. Her dark, sorrow-filled brown eyes meet mine with pity, as she nods in my direction and moves toward the door. She stops before she reaches it and looks back over her shoulder at me. The look she gives me, one of understanding and sympathy, has my heart palpitating painfully in my chest. There is no hope in that gaze. She doesn’t believe that Dinah will wake up.

“She’s strong and a fighter, but right now, she is fighting for her life. We have done all we can for her, and now it’s up to her to wake from the darkness.”

I drag my hands down my weary face as she leaves the room, the door closing softly with her departure, and I take up my post in the chair at Dinah’s side.Fuck, why won’t she wake up?It’s been over ten days since she was stabbed and almost died, and we were rescued and brought to this rebel safe house, hidden deep in the hilled terrain outside of the nearest metropolis. Nearly two weeks of my heart feeling like it’s being shredded, bit by bit, while I watch her struggle for breath.

My strong and ruthless Atasi, almost on the brink of death, fighting the demons that have her trapped in the dark all alone while I sit by her side, a lump of shit unable to help her. My finger strokes down her pale cheek, the skin looking paper thin and the veins below visible. She doesn’t even acknowledge my touch with a twitch.

Beautiful.Even in this fragile state, she is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. Most of her bruising is almost healed, and the cuts on her face have scabbed over. The stab wounds are finally healing, and yet, she doesn’t wake. She hasn’t come back to me.Please, return to me, Dinah. I’m here waiting for you.

Maybe you’re not the one to bring her back. The one she needs is still trapped in hell, because you left him there. She will never wake up until he is free.Violent thoughts start up once again in my mind, and I’m helpless to stop them.Maybe they’re right.The reason she doesn’t wake is that the person she loves is not here by her side. He is her champion, her white knight, while I’m nothing.

Sammy.She needs Sammy by her side to pull her from the darkness, but he’s still trapped behind enemy lines—a prisoner of Noah Rothesay, and his traitorous son.

My thoughts turn to Zeke, as they do a hundred times or more daily. My fists clench on my thighs, as rage courses through my body at the intel that the rebels have been able to gather. Noah doesn’t even realize he has rebels among his household staff and personal guards. Ones who are feeding the revolution all the information they need to take down the Brotherhood. Like my mother, who has returned to my father’s side to continue the pretense of being the perfect Sacred Wife.

“I have to return, Abraham, before I am missed. My position is too valuable, and I can’t allow myself to be discovered. They will send me word secretly if Dinah’s condition improves or worsens, but in the meantime, I will do all I can to find out the status of her guard.”

With a kiss on my forehead and without once looking back, she left me here amongst strangers, confident that they would protect Dinah and me, even though I’m less than reassured and trusting. My hand slides to the back of my pants, where I have a large blade tucked into the waistband and hidden from sight. No one will get past me and harm her again, not while I still breathe.

It seems that Zeke, the traitor, walks free, and whatever deal he made with his father to murder Dinah has benefitted him.Fucking bastard.They are claiming to the populace that theUnholy Ghostis a rebel who murdered his beloved new wife and kidnapped me, leaving him devastated.Give me a fucking break, was he devasted as he plunged the blade into the woman I love? I’ll see him fucking massacred for what he has done to her.

The rebels brought back propaganda showing the newly grieving husband playing his part, and being surrounded by the support of his father, mother, and Order brethren. The fucker even has the nerve to wear mourning robes, with a white ribbon and Dinah’s name scrawled on its surface.

Every time I see something with his miserable lying face on it, it makes my blood boil. How could he do this? How could he have deceived me all this time? How could he have betrayed Gabriel and Dinah like he has? How could he have been betraying me all that time, and I had not realized it?

Because you’re an idiot who loved him too much, and you chose to ignore all the signs. He has always been a manipulative bastard. You just thought you were special.

The Brotherhood claims to be actively looking for me, to save me from the clutches of the rebels, but the truth is that if they get their hands on me, I won’t live to see another day. They know I won’t go meekly into the prescribed fate they want to force on me. I know what Noah Rothesay has done, the crimes and horrors that he has committed. He can’t allow me to live, without worrying if I will try to murder him, and I would without any hesitation. He will die with my hand clasped around his neck, so that the last breath he takes will be mine. His death is mine, and I mean to collect payment, soon.

A rattling noise brings my attention to the beauty lying in the bed before me. Her chest rises and falls rapidly, and her hands lay at her side, twitching, rising an inch or two, and then falling back against the stark white linens. I rejoiced the first time I saw her move, thinking she was finally returning to me, only to be told it was her body’s involuntary movements and muscles spasming. My heart nearly stopped with the reality that she wasn’t waking, that she wasn’t coming back to the land of the living.

“Shhh, Atasi. I’m here, baby. I’m right here with you.” I lean forward and allow my lips to slide over her hand. Her skin is cold to the touch, as if she is trapped somewhere frigid despite the room’s warmth.

“You’re so beautiful, Atasi. Come back to me, baby, please. I need you,” I beg as a tear escapes the corner of my eye and lands on the bed. What am I going to do if she never wakes up? I can’t survive the thought of truly losing her, not while also having lost her brother and dealing with Zeke’s betrayal.Will I be able to keep going and keep breathing if she doesn’t?Another tear escapes me, the knowledge that I won’t want to, cements itself inside me.

If you go, Atasi, I go. I won’t allow you to leave me here alone.

I’m lost in my own thoughts when the beeping of the machine monitoring her heart rate speeds up, until alarms begin blaring loudly, scaring the fuck out of me. Her whole body convulses on the bed, a sight that will give me nightmares for the rest of my life, while I watch with terror, unable to help her. The door slams open, and footsteps rush inside the room. “She’s coding, fuck! Get him out of here!” A male voice shouts.

“Abraham, you have to move now.” A firm female voice shouts, before pushing my body away from Dinah’s.No, fuck, no! I can’t leave her.

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