Page 62 of Fracture

I shake my head. “No, you regret it because of me. Because you don’t want to hurt me. Take me out of it. Do you still regret it?”

Dylan rakes his hands over his head. “It doesn’t work like that. I can't take you out of it because you’rein it.”

“OK then, tell me this - did you enjoy it?”

They both stare at me. They were not expecting this, that much is clear. I glance from one to the other and raise my hands when they continue to just gape at me.

“Well?”

“I mean… yeah.” Levi finally admits. “I struggled with it, because I was convinced I wasn’t gay.”

“And you’re not,” I remind him, and he nods.

“No, I guess I’m not.”

Dylan puts his cigarette out and throws up his hands. “What are we doing here? Do you two want to be together? Do you want me to go? I don’t understand.”

“There isn’t any way I would ever want you to go.” I drape my arms over my crossed legs and lock eyes with him. “I love you, and I was afraid to lose you because of all this.”

“Me too,” Levi admits, frowning at the ground. “It… It fucking killed me. Thinking of losing you.”

“So whatarewe doing here?” Dylan looks from me to Levi and back again.

“What if we could all be together?” I ask, shrugging. Dylan still looks bewildered, but Levi nods slowly.

“Yeah, what if?” He looks over his shoulder at Dylan. “Maybe we don’t have to choose.”

Dylan shakes his head, rubbing a hand across his forehead. “I’m still struggling to… You two?” He gestures back and forth between us. “When did you realize this was a thing?”

“Her seventeenth birthday.” Levi smiles sadly at me. “Well, before that really. When our parents got married. At least for me. But I didn’t think it’d ever…. I don’t know.”

Dylan fixes me with sad eyes. “So, I’m not enough for you?”

I shake my head. “No, just like it’s not that I’m not enough for you.” I gesture to Levi. “Was sex with Levi better than sex with me?”

“No,” he says quickly. “No, it was…”

“You said it yourself, pretty boy.” Levi smiles over at Dylan. “Not better, it just depends on the person, remember?”

Dylan gets to his feet, biting his lip and shaking his head. “I’m gonna need a minute.” He looks at me, opening his mouth to speak, then shakes his head again and walks into the house. Levi and I sit in silence as Dylan’s footsteps fade into the distance, and then it’s just us alone outside on the porch.

“He’ll be OK,” Levi says to me with a smile. “I don’t think this is what any of us was expecting.”

“No, I guess not.” My head is still spinning from the cigarette and probably the martinis, and I sigh as I look at him. “You watched us on the stairs.”

“Yes, I did.” He scoffs with a crooked smile. “Never thought I’d be the one who’d be down for this first.”

“Forthis?” I want to hear him say it. I want to hear him say he’s choosing us both, to live in this relationship together, to tell me that I’m not sick for wanting it.

He nods, sprawling back in his chair, stretching his long legs out in front of him. “The three of us. I don’t know what folks call that now, kinda been a little isolated for the last few years.”

“Polyamory. That’s what they call it.”

“Right, right.” His mouth twitches into a grin. “Yes, I watched you on the stairs, as you very well know.”

“And you weren’t jealous?”

He shakes his head slowly. “Not even a bit. I liked it. Seeing you two together, watching him finish inside you. I saw that, and…” He hisses in a breath, and my clit throbs at his words. “I wasn’t jealous. I wanted it too.”

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