Page 43 of Fracture

“You set the pace,guera. I mean it. We go as slow or as fast as you want.” He brushes his lips against me, another soft touch that has need coursing through every inch of me. “But I’m just enough of a fucking animal for you that I’ll push as far as you’ll let me. So if you want to read me filthy books and toy with your pussy while you make me watch, I’ll do that. If you want me to eat you out while you do it, I’ll do that too. And if you let me tie you to the bed and fuck you til you forget your own name, I’ll do that too. Because I know you want me just as bad as I want you, and whatever’s holding you back, it doesn’t matter. We’re all that matters.”

I’ve stopped breathing, I know I have. I look into his beautiful face and shake my head. “I’m not going slow to torture you.”

“I know that. But you’re torturing yourself, I can see it. Just let go, and be with me. Just be with me, for today. Pretend there’s nothing else, but us.”

I can do that. I can shut off for a day and just be with him. I can give myself that. I can give him that. I lean against him, tilting my face up to his.

“Do you like to watch,papi?”

He exhales through gritted teeth, and nods. “Yeah, I do.”

“Maybe I’ll show you my toys when we get home.” I place a gentle kiss against his jaw, and his hand runs down my back. “Show you what I like.”

“Mmm, I like the sound of that,guera.” His fingers thread into my hair, and he pulls my head back. “Now, let’s get my girl some more dirty books.”

My whole body is pulled taut as we head to the bookstore, and I discard my coffee on the way in. I’m no longer interested in it because Dylan’s hand is hot around mine and all I want is to have those hands all over me. We head to the back of the store, to the romance section, and Dylan stands behind me, his body pressed against mine as I pluck a few titles from the shelves.

“You smell so good,” he says, brushing his nose along my neck. “Good enough to eat.” He nips at my shoulder, and I tense against him, suppressing a squeak. “So edgy.” He chuckles as his hands grip my hips.

“You sure know what you’re doing,” I say as I take another book down from the shelves.

“Oh you have no idea,guera.” He lowers his mouth to my ear. “I’d make you see stars while I lick this pussy.”

This does not feel like moving slow anymore. And I don’t fucking care. Desire rages through me, and I want to run a fucking freight train straight through my certainty that I’d hold off on giving in. But with Dylan’s hands on me and him whispering dirty words in my ear, I don’t want to take it slow. I want to take it so fast I snap my goddamn neck on the way.

“How long has it been for you, hmm?”

My breathing is rapid now, and I just want to get the hell out of here. “About a year.”

“A year? Shit. You really need to be looked after.”

“Been a hell of a lot longer for you,” I say with a laugh, leaning back against him, and suddenly he’s tense, stepping away from me to take the books from my hands.

“Let’s go.” He won’t meet my eyes, and all those happy, carefree feelings ebb away a little.

“Dylan? Did I say something wrong?”

“No, you didn’t, I just want to get you out of here.” He smiles but still won’t look at me, not really. “Come on, let me spoil my girl.”

He pays for my stack of romance books, and carries the bags back to the car. I try not to let my overthinking brain kick in, but when he still won’t look at me back at the car, I reach over and take his hand.

“Did something happen?” I dip my head to try and catch his gaze. “Dylan, please look at me.”

Before I know what’s happened, he’s grabbed my face, his mouth crashing into mine as he devours me hungrily. All my uncertainty melts away as his tongue swipes at mine, and I let myself get lost in kissing him.

“I slept with someone,” he tells me, pulling back with a furrowed brow. “It didn’t mean anything. It was just to blow off steam. I didn't want to push you, and I was just fucking dying for you, so I slept with someone else.” He says it all so fast, like a hurried confessor admitting his sins, and I have to blink a few times to let the words sink in after the euphoria of him kissing me. “I’m so sorry, Stella.”

I shake my head, cradling his neck in my hands. “No, no, don’t be sorry. Really, I’m not mad. I understand.”

His dark eyes bore into mine, filled with shame. “I love you. Not… anyone else.”

“I know. I know. Please, don’t feel guilty.” I kiss him again, and he seems to sag with relief. “You needed it, I get it.”

“I just want you,” he tells me, his eyes boring into mine. “I promise.”

Now it’s my turn for my eyes to drop, because I can’t say that back. I can’t lie to him. I can’t think about it. I kiss him again, and again, until we’re both hot and frenzied, and he murmurs, “Get this fucking car home, right now” in a tone of voice that makes me shiver.

I navigate the streets at a speed that’s barely legal, Dylan’s hand on my leg, riding up higher and higher. Sweat prickles at my scalp despite the cool air I turn on to blast us, and I neverrealized how far I live from downtown until today. Every red light has me wanting to pound my fists against the wheel.

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