Page 30 of Afflicted

“A preg-pregnancy -” I start crying harder as I think of what would be happening right now if that test had been positive.

Matt’s eyes widen and he clasps my face in his hands. “Are you pregnant?”

I shake my head. “No, no, no. I’m not.”

His face crumples almost into an expression of disappointment, and he clasps me to him. I get it. Some small part of him wants that life he hoped for with his wife, the family and kids and a swing set in the yard. We both want normality. I can’t blame him for it.

“I was so scared,” I whisper.

“I bet you were.” He kisses my forehead. “I’m so sorry, babe. You poor thing.”

“I was so relieved.” I wipe my tears away with the back of my hand. “I was so relieved when it was negative. They would have taken me away, and I’d have to give up the baby and -” I bite my lip, determined not to cry anymore. I’m not pregnant. I’m not being hauled away.

And Silas will hopefully get the message, and stay the fuck away from me.

CHAPTER10

JULIET

Except I can’t controlmy dreams.

Silas can invade those. I wake up shuddering violently, my thighs clenched together as my orgasm rolls through me. The feeling of his body subsides slowly, those enormous arms crushing me in them as he ground into me. I clutch on to my pillow, panting.

It’s still dark, no sign of dawn. It must be the middle of the night. I raise my head and look around. Everyone’s asleep.

I half-expect to see Silas standing at the end of my bed, sniffing me out as I get off. But he’s not there.

I haven’t seen him in two weeks. I don’t know where he’s gone, or if he’s even gone anywhere. Maybe he’s just doing a great job avoiding me. I hate that I’ve noticed his absence. And I’ve had sex dreams about him three fucking times now.

And in my dreams, he’s good. Really good.

I roll on to my back and sigh. It’s just frustration. Matt is still really trying, but it’s just… not satisfying. I try to show him how to touch me, how I like it, but he gets sensitive about it. Like I think he doesn’t know what he’s doing. I’ve never had a steady boyfriend before. I’ve never been in a long-term relationship, I don’t know how to navigate this shit.

I was 19 when they herded me in here. Still a kid. I still feel like that 19 year old girl. Inexperienced, caged, unable to grow or thrive. Maybe I’m being immature. Maybe I’m expecting too much of him. If I let him take the lead, maybe Matt will feel better. Maybe he just needs to feel like a man to heal. I don’t know.

I close my eyes, and Silas’s face swims before me. My body reacts instantly, retreating back into that dream world where Silas was driving into me, making me scream. I take a deep, shuddering breath, trying to calm down. I’m just frustrated. I am. That’s all. I’m trying to process it, and it’s not like there’s a lot of attractive men around. It’s not that I want Silas. I’m just frustrated. I’m frustrated. That’s all.

How many more times do I need to tell myself that’s all until I stop feeling guilty?

Matt shifts in the bed next to me, and my stomach does a flip, like he knows what I’m thinking. Oh god, what if I made noise while I was sleeping. My lungs clench in terror as I wonder ifI said Silas’s name.I cover my face with my hands.Shit.

I don’t have much more time to wonder as the alarm starts to whir above us. Everyone starts up in their beds, clutching blankets to themselves. Matt throws back his blanket and leaps over in my bed, clutching on my hands.

“Here we go again,” he says.

We all sit quietly, waiting. There’s nothing else for us to do but wait, as always.

“You OK?” Matt asks quietly. He seems to sense my tension, and strokes my knuckles with his thumb. “Sorry, dumb question.”

There’s an explosion nearby, and everyone scatters to the floor, carried by a chorus of screams. Matt and I huddle by my bed, his arms around me. I’m starting to wonder where the Afflicted are getting these weapons from. They’re sure as hell well-armed for a horde of mindless, virulent vampires.

Footsteps thunder past the dorm, and we hear shouting. Another explosion sounds, close enough to shake dust from the iron rafters above. Something hits the wall behind us, it sounds like gravel being kicked up, but it could also be bullets.

Matt and I scooch into the center of the dorm, away from the potential bullets. A few others do the same, and we all take cover there, just trying to breathe. Trying not to be consumed by terror.

It goes quiet suddenly, the alarm and the gunfire stopping simultaneously. For a moment, I’m seized by panic. If the Afflicted have overpowered the feeders, we’re fucked. Then I hear that terrible, droning sound of the Afflicted as they wail, and they’re really fucking close.

No one is firing on them. The feeders have abandoned us. There are probably too many of them, so they left us to our fate.