Page 148 of Afflicted

She frowns, shaking her head. “That was desperation. That was loneliness. This-” She puts her hand on my chest. “You and me, this is real. And whoever told you that you ruin everything, they didn’t see you. Not really. But I do. I see you.”

I wrap my arms around her, clutching her to me. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, angel.”

She inhales deeply. “I’m not Margot. You need to stop seeing her when you look at me.”

“I don’t. Not once, it’s not like that.”

“Then what is it?” She tilts her head to gaze up at me. “I want to understand.”

I gesture to the fire, and we sit down side by side, her hands firmly curled around one of my own. Her eyes are wide and searching, open and not judging me, just waiting for me to explain.

“Six months after I was turned, I went home.” I stroke the backs of my fingers along her wrist. “I was clean, I’d… I’d managed to get myself together, after doing some… terrible things. Margot, she saved me in so many ways. And then I was ready to go home. To show my family that I was a different person. Yes, I was a vampire, but that was a good thing. I wanted to show them that.”

Juliet stays silent, the firelight reflected in her grey eyes.

I breathe down the lump forming in my throat. “My little sister opened the door. She… She didn’t recognise me at first. I’d been a scrawny heroin addict stealing the family VCR last time she’d seen me. And now I was… well. This.”

“She must have been so happy.”

“She was. Shrieked with happiness, threw herself at me. ‘Si’s home!’ She just kept saying it over and over. I hadn’t seen her in almost a year. She was so beautiful, so happy.” Pain leeches into my bones, and I squeeze my eyes shut against the prickling threatening to throw more hot tears down my face. “My dad appeared in the kitchen doorway, my brother was right behind him. Mum came out of the lounge room. They all just stood there, staring at me. Dad saw the fangs first.”

“They thought you were a danger to them?”

“My dad, he lost it. Tore my sister away from me, told her and my brother to get upstairs. Mum burst into tears, started crying, asking what they’d done to me.” I shrug. “Vamps were becoming public knowledge, but there was so much fear, they didn’t understand. They thought I was a monster.”

“You’re not, though.”

I meet her eyes, and sigh. “I killed people, Jules. And not just by accident. I killed them because I was obsessed, because of what I wanted. I’m broken. I’m an addict.”

“No.” She clasps my face in her hands. “You’re not broken. You’re not just an addict. Stop saying that.”

I scoff out a cynical laugh. “Maybe this is my affliction, hmm?” I stroke the hair from her forehead. “Love. Margot used to joke about it, my obsessive nature. It’s a part of me, and it’s ruined me, over and over again. I don’t want it to ruin you too.”

“Too late.” Juliet brushes a soft kiss against my lips. “If this is ruin, then I’ll take it. I’ll take you and your ruin and your obsession, and everything that comes with it. Because I wantyou, Silas. All of you.”

I pull her into my lap, wrapping my arms around her waist and nuzzling into the soft crook of her neck. “I don’t deserve you.”

“Yes you do. We deserve each other.”

I inhale deeply, and can’t help but chuckle. “You smell like green apples.”

“It’s the shampoo from the colony.” She strokes my hair gently. “When I finally stopped screaming for you, I washed my hair.”

I pull back with a sharp breath, ready to apologize for leaving her there, for my weakness and self-loathing, for causing her yet more pain. But she silences me with a kiss, her fingers spearing through my hair.

“No more,” she murmurs against my mouth. “Now, you must be starving. You should drink.”

* * *

Juliet’sback lies against my chest, my arms firmly wrapped around her. Her breathing is deep and even, sleep claiming her a few hours ago. I hold her and thank my lucky stars that she’s here with me. I place a kiss behind her ear, and she shifts gently in my arms.

“Is it still night?” She asks sleepily.

“Yes, angel. Go back to sleep.”

She murmurs and wraps her hands around my arms. “Mmm, this is nice.”

I chuckle. “Sleeping on the ground in an abandoned farmhouse? Very nice.”

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