Page 114 of Relentless Sinner

I open my mouth to speak, but bile rises into my throat, making my head spin like it did when Mom took me on that crazy Ferris wheel ride when I was ten. It felt like the earth had turned upside down, inside out, thenaround and around and around and…

I cover my mouth and bolt.

I run as fast as I can and as straight as I can to the bathroom. I nearly fall over as I run through the door but make it to thetoilet just as I heave. Then I’m on the floor, hugging the toilet so it stops moving away from me.

Before my next thought can form, I’m throwing up everything I’ve ever eaten in my life. But I have enough awareness to be thankful I made it in time and didn’t barf all over Jaxon or in the room.

Shit.This is so fucking pathetic.

Suddenly, my hair is being moved out of my face and held back. I realize it must be him. He’s here with me.At my worst.

Thank God the grossest part seems to be over, but I still feel so disgusted with myself. I’d bet Estelle wouldneverdo this.

I’m thankful again when the vomiting stops completely. At least I can salvage some of my dignity.

Jaxon flushes the toilet and moves me away so I’m leaning against the wall. Then he grabs a towel and runs the cool tap over it.

I gaze up at him as he returns to me, kneels in front of me, and wipes my face. The cold, wet towel soothes the burning across my skin, and I want to sink into it.

He folds it and leaves it resting on my forehead then returns to the sink to fill up one of the little glasses with water.

When he comes back with it and hands it to me, I gulp it down, feeling desperate for the coldness to soothe my insides.

I feel like hell, and I don’t know how I’m going to get up. He sets the glass on the floor, and I think he may leave me. But he doesn’t.

He picks me up and positions us so he’s sitting on the floor with me curled in his lap and resting against his chest. I feel so small against him when we’re like this.

Jaxon holds the towel to my head and pulls me close to his steady beating heart, stroking my back.

“Is this better?” he whispers across my skin.

“Yes.” My voice is just a notch lower than his.

“Tell me what you want.” He maintains the same soothing tone.

I lift my head slightly so I’m looking at him, but he’s looking ahead of us.

“I want to go to med school,” I begin. “And I want to know that my sister is safe.”

He looks at me now, his gaze unwavering and tender. “Don’t worry about either of those things.”

“But I have to. I?—”

“No. I need you to trust me. Can you do that?” He searches my eyes.

Weeks ago if he’d asked me the same question, I would have said no, but I think in my heart, I would have been able to trust him. I do wholeheartedly now. “Yes. I trust you.”

He gives me a small smile and plants a kiss on the bridge of my nose. “What else do you want from me?”

I shouldn’t be surprised he knows there’s more. But those are the parts that expose my open heart.

I pull in a breath to clear my mind then take the leap of faith and decide to tell him. “I want you.” The confession comes easy. Easier than I thought possible. “And I don’t want to share you with anyone.”

“You never have, and you never will.” All I see when I look at him is truth. “I’m not with Estelle. I’ve never been with her. And I’m not with anybody else. I’m with you. You’re my wife. You will always be my wife. Not a contract.”

A tear slides down my cheek and I realize, even though my head is spinning, just how badly I wanted to hear him say that. “Do you really mean that?”

“Always.”

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