Page 110 of Relentless Sinner

When he’s with me, it feels like he’s with me and no one else. Things have also changed between us in ways I never imagined. I’ve embraced the feelings I have for him and stopped trying to fight them. There was no point when they were staring me in the face every second of the day.

I keep remembering what he said to me that night in the woods.

That I was the missing piece of him.Me.

I’ve never heard anything more beautiful or felt anything close to what I felt for him at that moment. My emotions were so deep I knew there was no turning back.

Yet everything ahead of us feels vague. It’s literally like we’re married, but now what?

All the issues we had before we got married haven’t simply vanished into the ether because we can’t keep our hands off each other.

Jaxon has gotten what he wanted. But what about me?

I don’t even know if he wants to stay married to me. Like with everything else, he hasn’t spoken about it. I have to be married to get my inheritance, and he needs me because of it. What happens when hestopsneeding me?

The unsettled thoughts stay with me long after Cora leaves, so I decide I’m going to speak to Jaxon when I see him tonight. I can’t allow another day to pass that sees me wasting it by wondering and waiting like some lost princess in a tower.

Today has to be the day.

Today is also perfect because it seems Jaxon is working from home like I thought. I spotted Levka heading to his office earlier for a meeting.

Levka has never been here in all the time I’ve been around. I guess things have changed now that Jaxon is the new Pakhan.

When the rain stops, I head out to the terrace, where I try to get lost in one of my Stephen King novels. But I fail. I’m readingSalem’s Lot,one of my all-time favorites, but I can’t pay attention long enough to get past the first few pages.

My nerves keep picking away at my mind like a little bird digging through the garden for food. That sayingdon’t poke the bearkeeps popping into my head.

In my case, I have a beast. My counter-argument with myself is if I don’t disturb the Beast, he’ll keep blocking my path. Then I’ll be stuck forever.

I gaze ahead at the trees and get lost in the array of fall colors. Burnt orange meets a variation of greens and browns, emblems of the seasonal shift.

It feels like me and the changes that have happened in my life. This time last year, Natasha and I were talking about traveling. She’d finished college and wanted to explore some sights before Dad married her off. I would have gone anywhere with her. Now I can barely say I know where she is.

I know she’s in Marseille, but that’s it. I can’t send a letter to her. I can’t pick up the phone and call her. I can’t see her whenever I want.

“You look like your mind is on another planet,” comes a voice that feels cold and unfamiliar to me.

I look around and find Levka literally standing next to me.

A shiver rushes down my spine at the sight of him. I never even heard him approach. My mind must have been on another planet if he got this close to me without me even hearing him.

I straighten instantly, recalling the warning Jaxon gave me months ago about not being alone with either of his cousins.

“I was just thinking about my book,” I lie, holding up the book with a taut smile. The smile isn’t rude yet not polite either. It silently asks the question:what do you want?

“Good book?” A lopsided grin slides across his face as he glances at the book in my hands.

“Yeah, it’s Stephen King,” I say that in a matter-of-fact tone.

“Of course. You didn’t strike me as a horror book girl, though. I thought you’d be more into the Classics.”

“I read everything.”

“That’s good.”

“Yeah.” I’m purposely trying not to be too specific so we don’t get into a deeper conversation.

“I just thought I’d come over and say hi.” His stare becomes more assessing as he studies my face, then drops his gaze to my breasts and stares for way too long. “I haven’t really spoken to you much since you became part of the family.”