Page 112 of Relentless Sinner

The uncertain look in her eyes doesn’t give me much assurance. “While I don’t know whether or not Jaxon and Estelle were ever an item, I’m sure they’re not togethernow.”

That still doesn’t reassure me. “What makes you think that?”

She gives me a poignant stare. “I know him. He may be a hard-headed, abrasive man, but I know him at heart. He’s never looked at anybody the way he looks at you. Like you’re more important to him than anything else. I don’t think a man like that would ever cheat on his wife.”

Her words are sweet, but I’m still thrown off balance with the possibility that Levka could be right. He said it was aknownfactthat Jaxon and Estelle have been together since their teens. And she was his constant.

Estelle could just be seeing what she wants to see because she’s a kindhearted person with good values and morals. She probably expects Jaxon to act in a certain way. That doesn’t mean he will.

And Jaxon is simply Jaxon. He’ll only allow you to see what he wants you to see.

“Hey.” Eve rests a hand on my shoulder. “Don’t worry yourself about things that don’t matter.”

I nod, but only to humor her. She may think I have nothing to worry about, but that’s not how I feel. “Okay. Thanks for the cookies.” I glance at the tray, shifting the subject.

“No worries. I thought you could do with a snack. I also wanted to talk to you about your trip to the Hamptons. Did you want to go to the hair salon or anything like that beforehand?”

“Okay, sure. It gets me out of the house.”

She sits with me for a while and goes through her list of things for me to do. I’m like a zombie the whole time, pretty much like how I was when we were planning the wedding.

Unlike that time, when I was thinking of all the ways to escape marrying Jaxon, I’m obsessing over him being with Estelle.

Night falls, and I find myself floating around the house like a ghost.

I pace the halls with my stomach in knots and that menacing feeling of uncertainty gnawing away at my insides like termites.

By the time the clock strikes midnight, I start thinking of all sorts of things. I imagine Jaxon and Estelle together. I keep thinking he must have been with her every night when he’s been away.

It’s crazy and I’m crazy because at the heart of it all, I shouldn’t care. This shouldn’t bother me because my marriageisa business contract. That is the truth and no matter what I want, I can’t change that.

So, why wouldn’t Jaxon be with a woman he’s always been with since they were kids?

That thought sends me down to the wine cellar. There I finish off one bottle of Merlot and grab one of Jaxon’s thousand-dollar bottles of wine to take upstairs to the bedroom.The empty bedroom.He’s not back yet.

I uncork the wine and drink straight from the bottle.

I’m not a huge drinker, but when I drink, I like wine. It’s great for me because it takes a while for me to get drunk. Meaning I can enjoy more of it and that mind-numbing sensation.

Tonight, though… I feel weird. Sadder and more helpless than ever.

The weight of all my worries has settled on my shoulders and I feel like shit. I sit on the floor in the corner of the room and continue drinking and thinking.

Why in the hell did my life have to turn out like this?

I had such big dreams I wanted to accomplish, and more than anything, I had my independence. I knew what I wanted to do with my life from such an early age, and everything I did was to make that possible. Then Jaxon happened.

How could one man have such an effect on me?

One man…

My husband.

There I was, thinking about med school and Natasha and deciding I wasn’t going to ask him about Estelle, not knowing she’s very much a problem, too.

I take another gulp of wine and start feeling sick. Looking at the bottle, I realize the wine is very old. Over a hundred years old. It also tasted like the kind my grandparents would collect for its strength. So, I probably had too much.

The click of the door suddenly sounds in my ear. It’s like it’s coming from far, far away, but it’s only across from me.

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