Page 76 of Hearts Of Darkness

I surge forward with one final thrust, my balls flush to my body. I can almost taste the oblivion, and then I’m there, my stifled groan shattering the space between us as I fill her up with everything I have left.

“My angel…”

“My devil,” she cries.

Her words stab like blades. She’ll never know how right she is. She thinks she knows the worst about me, but here’s the deal…

She’s barely scratched the surface.

Afterward,we shower together, frozen like statues beneath the falling water. Heads hanging, the water streaming down our faces like a never-ending flow of tears.

My hands are resting lightly on her hips. She won’t speak to me. She won’t even look at me. I reach out to switch the water off, and gently tilt her chin up.

“Talk.”

She bites down on her lower lip. It’s a new trait of hers, like the nail-biting thing. It tells me she’s fretful and uneasy.

“Is this it?” I hear her say, her melodious voice hitting all the minor keys. “Will I ever see you again?”

I run the pad of my thumb across her lip to stop her biting down. “I need to end this…this war with my brother.”

“All that bloodshed, and for what? A crooked empire to preside over?” She rests her head against the frosted glass, herface turned away from me.

If only it were that easy.I swear I can taste the innocence on her skin.

“This is your chance to leave it all behind, Dante. You have the money so go buy yourself another fortress, go invest in stocks and shares, banks, nightclubs… anything but this!”

Her faith in my ability to transform into a law-abiding citizen is touching, but I’m too entrenched in this world to ever let it go. The organization needs stability, and it’s time for me to step up and take control.

“I need to finish him, my angel, before he finishes me.”

“So, you like pushing coke and wrecking lives, is that what you’re implying?” She brushes past me and steps out of the stall to grab a towel from the rail.

“It’s never been about the drugs, Eve. You know that.”

“No, it’s about bloodlust. You left the military, but you missed the kill, so you seek your kicks elsewhere.”

I’m staggered by her perception. And here I was thinking I’d kept it so well hidden.

She catches my eye in the mirror above the sink. She has no idea how perfect she looks with her ethereal skin and her dark hair, now jet-black from the water and falling in damp tendrils around her face.

She drops eye contact first. It’s like she can’t bear to look at me anymore. My lack of morality is a black hole that even she can’t fathom. She thinks she can fix me, but it’s too late for that. I’m damaged far beyond anything her sweet salvation can touch.

“What can I do?” I hear her say, her voice laced with despair. “How can I make you see that there’s another life forus.”

“I will find you again, Eve.”

She nods, but I know she doesn’t believe me.

I step out of the stall as well, and slide my arms around her waist, pulling her back against my body. She feels so breakable in my embrace.

“Distract yourself with words when I’m gone,” I murmur into her damp hair. “Find a part of me in every flawed hero. Use fiction to erase every wrong I’ve ever done to you with the deeds befitting of a good man, a better man.”

She flinches as if I’ve struck her. “I don’twantto replace you. You’ve broken my heart more times than I can count since you held a gun to my head, but I can’t simply erase my feelings…” She trails off as her eyes widen in comprehension. “Is that the real reason you gave me your gun? Was that your messed-up Santiago way of trying to redress the balance of our first night?”

“No, my angel,” I say grimly. “That was me giving you the chance to reap vengeance for my part in your brother’s death.”

I curse myself, a thousand times over, as I watch her eyes fill with tears. I’ve gone and reminded her of what a fucking monster I am.